skitzofreniks

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skitzofreniks

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 29 July 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1047
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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skitzofreniks's page activity

Visits<b>xxDeeStar</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 5:20am<b>nikkibodnarchuk</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 11:24pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 9:57am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:39pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 8:15am<b>pengyvan</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 2:17am<b>brianjman14</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 5:27pm<b>gb37</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 1:45am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:48am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:48pm<b>xSLEEPYxHEADx</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 3:03am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 9:21pm<b>Darkness121</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:13pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 4:39pm<b>coookiiis</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 1:31am<b>steelerguy43</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 1:36am<b>RoseBlack123</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:46am<b>VHNox</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 5:35pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 11:05pm

skitzofreniks's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of skitzofreniks's badges

skitzofreniks's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom called while I was at a job interview. I ignored the call, but the interviewer was so offended by the fact I'd rudely left it on at all, that he threw me out. I found out from my mom later that she'd called to wish me good luck. FML

by unemployed / 08/24/2012 at 2:00pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

by erockinthesuburb / 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was attending my bachelor party. I watched a very attractive young girl dancing on a pole, giving me a seductive look. As she walked up to me, I realized it was my soon-to-be wife's younger sister. FML

by wellthisisawkward80 / 11/06/2011 at 1:15am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my license to carry a gun expired because my manager forgot to renew it. As I'm an armored car guard, this is a problem. In order to keep getting hours, my company transferred me to the coin vault. I just finished moving 15000 lbs of boxed coins. By hand. I'm stuck doing this for a month. FML

Today, I went to the movies on a date. I went to pay for the tickets when I realized that I didn't have my wallet. Instead of my boyfriend paying, he laughed and paid for his own ticket. Then he went ahead and saw the movie without me. FML

by myBFsucks / 10/05/2011 at 12:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, when I came home from work, my computer was drenched with water. My sister claimed there was smoke coming out of it. FML

by Tokany / 04/28/2011 at 3:29pm / Romania (Cluj) / Miscellaneous

Today, a tornado watch has been instituted in my town. At this moment, I have violent diarrhea, and my toilet sits right in front of a window. FML

by cnamobi / 04/28/2011 at 12:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my "friend" told me I was weird and irritating. Yet she has an unhealthy obsession with Harry Potter, hates people in general, and has a Facebook for her cat. Yeah, I'm the weird one. FML

by weirdome23 / 04/26/2011 at 5:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend punched a hole in a door. This is on top of the broken handle, cracked sink top, dented fridge, and other holes in the wall he has also made. We are 4 months into our year lease. I don't think we are getting our $720 deposit back. FML

by Username / 04/14/2011 at 2:59am / Money

Today, I held a door open for my boyfriend and jokingly said, "Chivalry is dead?" He responded with, "Who's chivalry?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wore a Stanford college T-shirt to school. My Spanish teacher took one look at it and said "You wish". FML

by anon / 04/12/2011 at 6:09am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

by Anonymous / 08/10/2009 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous