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silentshadow90's FML badges
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silentshadow90's favorite FMLs
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy
Today, I'm at work on a construction site for a high rise building, on the 12th floor today. I've developed a severe case of the runs, causing me to need to rush to the nearest toilet periodically. Luckily for me it's conveniently located on the ground floor. FML
by bob the builder / 11/08/2012 at 9:36am / United States (Mississippi) / Health
by pheebs314 / 11/07/2012 at 4:16pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by sadness1992 / 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my friend joked to my co-workers that my kitty-cat of a husband was going to beat me for spending $200 on shoes. Later on, my rather large dog was so excited to see me when I walked in the door, he split my lip. Somehow, I don't think they'll believe me when I get to the office tomorrow. FML
by iLuvsIt / 11/06/2012 at 4:32am / Australia (Victoria) / Work
Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML
by fnfantastic / 11/04/2012 at 11:37am / United States (Indiana) / Money
Today, my hubby and I decided to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town, so we drove to one that was 30 mins away. We decided on our items, and went to the check out. Who would have guessed my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML
by screwed / 11/04/2012 at 4:55am / United States / Intimacy
by heartbroke / 11/03/2012 at 6:02am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML
by okay._. / 11/01/2012 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/30/2012 at 7:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Health
by you / 10/30/2012 at 3:46pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by SadExperiment / 10/29/2012 at 8:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML
by Ceej / 10/28/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Monkey / 10/27/2012 at 11:02am / United States / Intimacy
by Kallian / 10/25/2012 at 3:08am / Australia / Money