shutupmichaela

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Offline (the 05/25/2016 at 12:30pm)

shutupmichaela

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 September 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1047
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shutupmichaela : sadly, no, I am not Hayley Williams from Paramore.

shutupmichaela's page activity

Visits<b>lambda</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 12:56am<b>dno79</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:09pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:37am<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 5:43am<b>i_lol_at_life</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 9:25pm<b>fhlakd</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 1:21am<b>Jayms</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 4:25pm<b>frnk</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 10:59pm<b>NateshN</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 2:31pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 12:47am<b>scottwaite</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:58am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:08pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:44am<b>bs252</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:43am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:30am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:14am<b>TransitLetum</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:59am<b>orcatheseapanda</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 9:07am

Fucked!<b>fhlakd</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 7:21am<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:45pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:14pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 3:23am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:21am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:03am<b>gary3768</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 3:28am

shutupmichaela's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of shutupmichaela's badges

shutupmichaela's favorite FMLs

Today, I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in a while. I swear I couldn't help it when the words "Wow, I bet you really regret that haircut." came out of my mouth. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 3:30am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2014 at 7:34am / United States / Kids

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2014 at 7:33pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm / Bangladesh / Love

Today, I had a dream that I was playing fetch with my dog. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't woken up to the sound of my phone smashing against the wall. FML

by jessierules93 / 12/07/2013 at 12:58am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

by CanWeAllGetOne / 11/13/2013 at 1:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

by long day / 11/12/2013 at 3:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML

by tramp / 11/10/2013 at 12:51am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

by notsogood / 11/08/2013 at 3:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

by Where is the faith in Humanity / 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

by davincidasecond / 11/05/2013 at 12:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

by UnfortunatelyAmusing / 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

by Argh / 11/03/2013 at 3:18pm / France (Poitou-Charentes) / Miscellaneous

Today, l grounded my 17-year-old son from his computer because of his terrible attitude towards his homework. As payback, he convinced my 5-year-old daughter that if she goes to sleep, she'll never wake up. I now have a hysterical and sleepless child to deal with. FML

by PIGaming / 10/28/2013 at 1:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.