shutupmichaela

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shutupmichaela

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 September 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1140
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shutupmichaela : sadly, no, I am not Hayley Williams from Paramore.

shutupmichaela's page activity

Visits<b>Splandido</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 11:23pm<b>Blesst</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 2:55am<b>warrior123_blah</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 5:20pm<b>lambda</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 12:56am<b>dno79</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 8:09pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:37am<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 5:43am<b>i_lol_at_life</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 9:25pm<b>fhlakd</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 1:21am<b>Jayms</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 4:25pm<b>frnk</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 10:59pm<b>NateshN</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 2:31pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 12:47am<b>scottwaite</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:58am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:08pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:44am<b>bs252</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:43am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 11:30am

Fucked!<b>fhlakd</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 7:21am<b>pete9913</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:45pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:14pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 3:23am<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:21am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:03am<b>gary3768</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 3:28am

shutupmichaela's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of shutupmichaela's badges

shutupmichaela's favorite FMLs

Today, while explaining to a group of kids that monkeys are very intelligent creatures, one of them flung poo in my face. FML

by Shitty day / 05/24/2016 at 1:59am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I showed my husband a recipe for the meal I wanted us to make tonight. He saw cumin was an ingredient and broke into hysterics. By the time he managed to stop laughing, he gasped that he couldn't eat something "with cumin it" and broke down laughing again. FML

by -__- / 12/26/2015 at 8:41am / Miscellaneous

Today, for some reason entirely beyond my knowledge, Siri referred to me as "Sugartits". FML

by anonymous / 07/19/2015 at 9:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 12:41pm / Canada / Kids

Today, my boyfriend said "You're a real work of art. You know, the abstract kind that no one likes. Anyway, we need to break up." FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2014 at 12:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

by Disappointed / 10/03/2014 at 11:08pm / Health

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

by haileelouxxx / 08/22/2014 at 8:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML

by bertiebeth / 08/02/2014 at 1:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Love

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

by Ow / 04/18/2014 at 7:09am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

by the long distance guy / 04/08/2014 at 3:56am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2014 at 5:34am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I spent my first night at my boyfriend's place, and my first night sleeping beside him. I woke up in the early hours to him holding me and muttering in his sleep something like "surprise fisting". I'm beyond terrified. FML

by cockfist / 03/04/2014 at 5:41pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Intimacy