About shuoq76 : Alright, well for starters I'm 16 years old and from America. I just hang around FML from time to time and I like to leave comments all around. :D but if you must know anything about me.... It's that I'm quite musically talented. I play the guitar, piano, the drums (kinda) and I sing.. Alot! Sooo yeahh I probably wasted like half a minute of your life but that's cool right?
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shuoq76's favorite FMLs
Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML
by Jeremy / 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML
by pissedoffandon / 05/06/2009 at 10:07am / United Kingdom (London) / Animals
Today, I went to my girlfriend's sorority formal, we were both drunk. We went into the bathroom, she started to give me head. After about 30 seconds the song changes and she jumps up and goes out to dance, leaving me there. Door open. Penis out. It was the song she requested. FML
by Lootz / 05/03/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was going to a stoplight party. Green shirt=single, yellow=hard to get and red=taken. I show up wearing a red shirt and I see my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake, I ask him jokingly why he isn't wearing red. He looks at me weird and says, "Oh, you didn't get my text?" FML
by 1234567898765432 / 03/27/2009 at 12:47pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by name50 / 02/07/2009 at 1:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me he's unhappy with his life. He's basically with me because I… Today, I met the man of my dreams. Hot, funny, smart, sensitive, he guesses at what I need before I… Today, as a freelancing musician, I had to pass on the best gig I've ever been offered (worth over…