shaww

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Offline (the 09/07/2015 at 11:07pm)

shaww

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10556
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>Savagexxx008</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 6:47pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 12:00pm<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:54pm<b>11Tec11</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:47pm<b>cowofthenorth</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:23am<b>jeffrey1992</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:03pm<b>CliffPaul</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:27am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 2:07pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 11:48pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 7:10pm<b>myoukei</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:06am<b>nachomanwon</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:36pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:42pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 7:54am<b>enderman99125</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:07pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:51pm<b>bmarrott</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:08pm

shaww's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw the script for the end of year assembly skit I'm forced to participate in. Looks like on my last day of high school, I'll be running around in a rainbow unicorn costume in front of my entire high school and their parents. FML

by Banana_Lord / 05/25/2014 at 9:43pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

by whoops / 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, the only person in my entire family to show up sober and on time to my graduation was my grandma. FML

by Congrats to me / 05/24/2014 at 7:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML

by NaCl / 05/24/2014 at 5:20pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer. We're very close, and I called my boyfriend, really needing some support. I'd barely told him what had happened, when he replied, "Babe, I'm in the middle of a game here. Call me later." FML

by Anonymous / 05/24/2014 at 3:31pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I explained to my dad that I had spent over three hours baking, frosting, and decorating a cake from scratch and how proud I was of it. Without even looking up at me, he replied, "You really need a boyfriend." FML

by lifesabitch2016 / 05/24/2014 at 2:23am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

by todaddy / 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML

by notgoodwitholdpeople / 05/23/2014 at 12:00pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally ripped out my boyfriend's insulin pump while trying to give him a lapdance. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2014 at 10:36pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, five minutes before closing, a woman came in to buy over $300 worth of clothing from the sales rack. My manager and I had to ring it all up, de-sensor it, fold it, bag it, etc. After it was all rung up, her credit card was declined. FML

by IntoTheClouds / 05/22/2014 at 10:32pm / United States (Vermont) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my daughter admitted why her grades, which are usually straight A's, have been slipping the past few weeks. Turns out she has been deliberately failing tests to avoid becoming valedictorian, so she won't have to deliver a speech at graduation. FML

by stillaproudfather / 05/22/2014 at 3:24pm / United States / Kids

Today, I collected my students' final essays. One of them submitted a printout of a screenshot he took with his phone. Too bad a browser address bar was still in the shot, along with a "click to read more" link at the bottom. My students are too dumb and lazy to even plagiarize properly. FML

by What am I doing with my life? / 05/22/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

by Q / 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm / Singapore / Intimacy