shaww

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Offline (the 09/07/2015 at 11:07pm)

shaww

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8419
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About shaww : Just a simple guy. I am a grammar nazi... so beware.
Wanna know me? Message me

shaww's page activity

Visits<b>Savagexxx008</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 6:47pm<b>arsh_fz</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 12:00pm<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 11:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:54pm<b>11Tec11</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 2:47pm<b>cowofthenorth</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:23am<b>jeffrey1992</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:03pm<b>CliffPaul</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:27am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 2:07pm<b>Frowny</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 11:48pm<b>couchcat</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 7:10pm<b>myoukei</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:06am<b>nachomanwon</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 11:36pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:42pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 7:54am<b>enderman99125</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 2:07pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:51pm<b>bmarrott</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>AlexOrban</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>joco4</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:08pm

shaww's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of shaww's badges

shaww's favorite FMLs

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

by pissed out pants / 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my only child introduced his new girlfriend to me. He is 36 and has no children. She is 46 and has a pregnant daughter who she is very close with. I don't know if I'll ever be a grandfather, but in any case, my son is going to be one before me. FML

by Greatgrandpa / 11/30/2014 at 12:29pm / Curacao / Kids

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

by mellielynnemily / 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm / United States / Love

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML

by Beeper / 10/11/2014 at 3:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

by dicksonthebrain / 09/26/2014 at 9:03am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my girlfriend told me that the necklace I gave her wasn't a "unique enough gift." I spent two weeks making that necklace, link by link. FML

by NoConfusion / 09/14/2014 at 8:53am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", honey. FML

by healthfreak / 09/06/2014 at 9:57pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML

by apparentlybutch / 09/05/2014 at 5:11pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

by disappointedjamaican / 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm / United Kingdom (Coventry) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

by BagelTheOtaku / 08/20/2014 at 1:15am / United States (Georgia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople / 08/11/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

by sirphilmckraken / 08/08/2014 at 1:30pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.