Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

shanekicksass

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

shanekicksass

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1501
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

shanekicksass's page activity

Visits<b>buckydargon</b> - yesterday at 11:51am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:30pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 7:08pm<b>subhaan786</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 2:32pm<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 3:14pm<b>SpaceFinn</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 3:45pm<b>Gregor1234</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 6:21pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 2:17pm<b>Bobsleder</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:57am<b>iPixiee</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:01pm<b>rachb007</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 4:40pm<b>winchestinalock</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 10:33am<b>gerardwhy</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 9:17am<b>charliedee</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:43pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:35pm<b>emmatheamazingx</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 12:56am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 6:00pm<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:57am

shanekicksass's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of shanekicksass's badges

shanekicksass's favorite FMLs

Today, I drove my dad to Walmart to do some shopping. His leg is still in a cast after an accident, so I helped him to the last mobility scooter. A guy whose only disability was clearly Fat-Fuck Syndrome then yelled at us, claiming he needed it more and that my dad was a faker. FML

#21343482
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33478) - you deserved it (2079)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:25pm - misc - by Elrond Hubbard (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by canceling our relationship status on Facebook. I commented in disbelief, only for my dad to reply "#rekt", then "But seriously, about time. She's gonna give your balls back, right?" Thanks for the support. FML

#21334865
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26343) - you deserved it (3145)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:57am - love - by kumcat (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45924) - you deserved it (11863)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27787) - you deserved it (7518)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

#21281163
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29801) - you deserved it (7892)

On 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by Deadpool434 (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31478) - you deserved it (14479)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51315) - you deserved it (11841)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35235) - you deserved it (11529)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52668) - you deserved it (7173)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

#21204913
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48209) - you deserved it (8519)

On 07/10/2014 at 9:34am - love - by oh my fucking god (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52452) - you deserved it (11468)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: