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setsuna9

Offline (the 01/20/2016 at 11:41pm) | Search for a member

setsuna9

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1631
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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setsuna9's page activity

Visits<b>ImaKoala</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 9:20pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 2:59am

setsuna9's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of setsuna9's badges

setsuna9's favorite FMLs

Today, after years of difficulty, I finally found the perfect shade of foundation that matches my ultra-pale complexion. It's called "Death Flesh." FML

#21486907
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22915) - you deserved it (2179)

On 11/01/2015 at 1:22pm - misc - by 2pale - United States (Texas)

Today, my roommate remembered that we have an essay due Monday, so he wrote the full essay, while stoned, in less than an hour, without using his textbook. It was better than the one I spent all week writing. He is now upstairs having sex, and I've lost all motivation. FML

#21467953
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27085) - you deserved it (2687)

On 09/13/2015 at 11:34am - work - by anonymous (woman) - Luxembourg

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33612) - you deserved it (14042)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I tried to work on my attitude at work. People say I'm mean, so I tried to be nice all day. Apparently I'm now condescending. FML

#21415518
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25862) - you deserved it (3784)

On 05/25/2015 at 1:42pm - work - by Frustrated - United States

Today, my father tried to excuse his alcoholism by saying that his stomach stops working, and he needs to drink vodka to get it started again. FML

Today, my dad tricked the local biker gang into believing he's actually part of the Russian mob. FML

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

#21353290
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31034) - you deserved it (19690)

On 02/10/2015 at 9:51am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29785) - you deserved it (8516)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I handed my boss my 2 weeks' notice. 20 minutes later, I was doing my work alone in the very cold basement of the building. My boss claimed it was a routine relocation planned months in advance. It's going to be a long 2 weeks. FML

#21341091
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30844) - you deserved it (2673)

On 01/20/2015 at 5:52pm - work - by M. Night Shytefuck (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I snooped around my parents' room looking for hidden Christmas presents. The only hidden things I found was a whip, two ball gags, several other sex toys, and a load of newspaper clippings about the JFK assassination. What the fuck? FML

#21312961
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22619) - you deserved it (36396)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:10am - misc - by .__. (woman) - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43689) - you deserved it (13255)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27897) - you deserved it (56137)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53193) - you deserved it (9553)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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