sens3sfailing

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Offline (the 08/20/2014 at 7:20am)

sens3sfailing

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3686
  • Number of comments : 1188
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About sens3sfailing : 1) I am an atheist and biology student
2) My favorite band is Memphis May Fire
3) my name comes from another one of my favorite bands, senses fail
5) I enjoy paradoxes, riddles, and conundrums.
6) you didn't notice there was no number 4
7) you went back to check if there really was no number 4.
9) you're laughing to yourself
10) there is no number 8
11) you checked again didn't you?
12) there is no number 11.
13) okay I lied.

sens3sfailing's page activity

Visits<b>Rgduncan</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 9:32am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 9:06pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 2:11am<b>bbenedict</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 2:48pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 5:50am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 3:00am<b>itsalanis</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 8:24pm<b>Grimmerie</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 6:59am<b>nikkinik1424</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:16pm<b>jman1324</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 2:14pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 7:50am<b>Ideastogetback</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 1:30am<b>dyoy_87</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 6:44pm<b>Vegnas</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 10:38pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 10:03am<b>FreshDonuts</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 1:25pm<b>helloimclaudia</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:32pm<b>ninety</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 2:59pm

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 12:08pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:17pm<b>D_Word_Head</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 4:38am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:01am<b>katianne</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:38pm

sens3sfailing's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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sens3sfailing's favorite FMLs

Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2012 at 10:20am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was mugged. Not for a laptop, cell phone or money, but for the cupcake I was eating. FML

by Anonymous / 07/26/2012 at 6:42am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 5:35am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

by CHStennis_4 / 09/03/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I downloaded an application for my phone that reads whatever you type out loud. I started making it say things like "You like it when daddy spanks your tight little ass don't you?" Just as the message was playing back out loud, my mom walked up the stairs. FML

by biglady / 02/17/2011 at 2:02am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

Today, my wife thought it would be fun to bring in one of her girlfriends for a threesome. Because of the friend, I now know what my wife sounds like when she's having a REAL orgasm. Five years and two kids into our marriage. FML

by onehundredpercenteffed / 08/13/2009 at 9:46pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, a little girl standing next to me on the train suddenly hugged me. I thought maybe she was sad or I reminded her of someone, and hugged her back. Then she smiled, squeezed my lovehandles, and said "Honk, honk!" FML

by squeezable / 06/19/2009 at 1:48pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML

by kat9232000 / 06/19/2009 at 12:04am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

by badmom101 / 05/16/2009 at 7:26am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love