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schalk

Offline (the 01/12/2016 at 7:04pm) | Search for a member

schalk

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 March 1980 (35 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4984
  • Number of comments : 244
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About schalk : Don't be a smartass if you're not smart, otherwise you're just an ass.

schalk's page activity

Visits<b>rainbowsRlove</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 12:02pm<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 1:15pm<b>CompanionCube220</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 1:46pm<b>Georgia951</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 7:03pm<b>brieee</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 2:57pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 4:47pm<b>ThatGuy1411</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 1:43pm<b>derpina72</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:01am<b>em_iweird</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 2:06am<b>helloimclaudia</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 9:05pm<b>Harpy</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 12:34pm<b>Beealicious</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:00am<b>lolcat97</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 9:24pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 10:04pm<b>madrid201</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 8:32pm<b>anonfmler08</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 4:43am<b>PeaceTea13</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 12:55pm<b>boredgirl123</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 7:56pm

Fucked!<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 7:15pm

schalk's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of schalk's badges

schalk's favorite FMLs

Today, the AC broke in the kitchen of the restaurant I work at. Temperatures reached over 100 degrees and one of my coworkers nearly passed out. Our boss accused us of being "dramatic" and only let us step out after I collapsed. I need this job too badly to quit. FML

#21477146
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24401) - you deserved it (1592)

On 10/07/2015 at 12:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I caught two kids passing notes to each other in my class, so I told them to see me afterwards. When one of the kids eventually came up, I noticed he was crying. He looked up at me and sobbed out, "I was trying to make my first friend!" FML

#21466251
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26459) - you deserved it (7151)

On 09/08/2015 at 8:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, the girl I've gone on two dates with showed up at my house with several boxes of her stuff, expecting to move in. FML

#21465097
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30934) - you deserved it (2467)

On 09/06/2015 at 1:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend was putting baby powder on my bare ass, when his dad walked into the room, casually set a laundry basket next to the bed, and walked out like nothing happened. FML

#21464906
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24772) - you deserved it (7657)

On 09/05/2015 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by ManderDander (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I parked my car, went to pay for my spot, and returned to my car only to find a parking violation ticket tucked under the windshield wipers. This all happened in less than a minute. FML

#21464737
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26038) - you deserved it (1862)

On 09/05/2015 at 12:26am - money - by occam's pube-razor (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was telling my dad how my boyfriend dumped me yesterday. He responded by blowing his nose into his hand, wiping it in my hair, then saying "There, a REAL problem to whine about." FML

#21457532
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24356) - you deserved it (2671)

On 08/18/2015 at 8:34am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML

#21457265
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28452) - you deserved it (1925)

On 08/17/2015 at 6:46pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I posted on Facebook about a cooking mishap I had. My fiancé and ex then spent the next hour trading stories of my other kitchen disasters in the comments. FML

#21454739
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23486) - you deserved it (5196)

On 08/11/2015 at 10:29am - love - by Frozen Food Fan - United States (Nevada)

Today, I posted on Facebook about a cooking mishap I had. My fiancé and ex then spent the next hour trading stories of my other kitchen disasters in the comments. FML

#21454739
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23486) - you deserved it (5196)

On 08/11/2015 at 10:29am - love - by Frozen Food Fan - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had to serve an incredibly rude and irrationally angry customer, but I managed to keep my cool. When he finally went to leave with his purchase, I wished him a good day. He whirled around and yelled "I'll have whatever the fuck kind of day I want, bitch!" FML

#21453572
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27309) - you deserved it (1877)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:23pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at the local supermarket, I spotted an attractive woman packing food into a shelf. Trying to be flirty, I asked where I could find the cream cheese. Apparently, it was on the shelf right behind me. I heard her mutter "idiot" under her breath. FML

#21453297
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21069) - you deserved it (10942)

On 08/07/2015 at 9:59pm - misc - by godzilllla - United States (Washington)

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

#21443162
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27141) - you deserved it (3279)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm - misc - by AK-47 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34561) - you deserved it (2528)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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