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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11150
  • Number of comments : 229
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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sarah2144's page activity

Visits<b>catsrule307</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 8:53am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 11:43pm<b>samchaps19</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 12:13am<b>SamKiwi</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 8:42pm<b>captainriggins</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 10:25am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 5:09pm<b>rockwrench</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 8:21am<b>kaed</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 10:39pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 10:09am<b>neonvortex</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:00pm<b>IniestaRox</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 3:19pm<b>mkaylak</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:52pm<b>loveestt</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:23am<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:50am<b>xxmollyxx</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 7:59am<b>nightlyblues86</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 6:56am<b>zoratheexplora</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:10pm<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 11:09pm<b>IniestaRox</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 9:19pm

sarah2144's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of sarah2144's badges

sarah2144's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2009 at 4:14am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

by OhGeez / 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

by paranoid / 06/06/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML

by Kimmiko / 06/04/2009 at 8:17am / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Transportation

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

by deucelututi / 05/31/2009 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

by a / 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2009 at 8:40am / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Intimacy

Today, I was coaching a little league soccer game. I was telling one of my players to go cover another kid. I said "go cover the little yellow kid!" because he happened to be wearing a yellow shirt. He also happened to be Asian. I then got death stares from his family members. FML

by Anonymous / 05/17/2009 at 9:48am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

by badmom101 / 05/16/2009 at 7:26am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

by airport / 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML

by t-dawg / 05/09/2009 at 12:18am / United States (Minnesota) / Transportation