About sanchezjesus368 : Hello. I see that you were curious to learn more about me how cute. Well if you really want to get to know me add me on Xbox-MonsterHunter32.
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sanchezjesus368's favorite FMLs
Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by violated ._. / 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm / United States / Animals
Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML
by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML
by i hit a cyclist / 05/27/2013 at 7:19am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Transportation
by Liferuinedforever / 05/14/2013 at 3:13am / Pakistan (Sindh) / Kids
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
by WetWalking / 03/21/2013 at 9:31am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 6:10am / United States (Colorado) / Health
by pdub523 / 01/27/2013 at 12:57am / United States (Texas) / Love
by TheLastSerenade / 01/23/2013 at 3:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by MeanMother / 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids
by GM38 / 06/22/2012 at 10:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, my 14-year-old brother told me he needed help with something "very personal." Thinking he wanted girlfriend advice or something, I said, "Sure, no problem". He wanted me to shave his butt crack. FML
by liquid_sasquatch / 05/29/2012 at 6:40pm / United States / Kids