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samoht1997's FML badges
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
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samoht1997's favorite FMLs
by BX / 10/17/2015 at 8:09am / Netherlands / Health
Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML
by afather / 06/14/2015 at 9:41am / United States (South Dakota) / Kids
by danceinconverse / 05/22/2015 at 4:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML
by oooooops / 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by ajodasdojsad / 03/21/2015 at 11:12am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous
by shawnsmuffins / 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by brokeforever / 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm / Latvia (Riga) / Animals
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
by smooth / 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm / United States / Work
Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML
by Anonymos_fmler / 10/20/2014 at 8:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML
by Deadpool434 / 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML
by Beeper / 10/11/2014 at 3:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by shelookslikemiley / 09/23/2014 at 8:48am / Australia / Geek
by Anonymous / 09/17/2014 at 4:07pm / United States / Love
by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by kirstyrd / 08/12/2014 at 2:07am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
- Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job."… Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this… Today, I found out that my best friend lost her virginity to my father. Her excuse? She was drunk.…