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samara12's favorite FMLs
Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML
by Atheist / 03/22/2012 at 12:56am / United States (Oregon) / Work
by nazooer / 03/21/2012 at 9:50pm / United States / Health
by J.O.S / 03/21/2012 at 5:06pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by MoneyMoneyMoneyMonayMONAY / 03/21/2012 at 4:13pm / United States / Money
Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML
by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by Username / 03/21/2012 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Work
Today, I was out with my dog, who loves to bury things. He had recently torn apart his toy and buried it in the sand. I saw a piece of it sticking out of the ground, so I picked it up. It turns out that I was not holding his toy, but rather a dead bat. FML
by GabisayzRAWR / 03/21/2012 at 12:03pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals
Today, I realised that I've been working in an all-male environment for too long when my supervisor walked into the canteen visibly scratching his balls, and this seemed like a completely normal occurrence. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 9:25am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
Today, I was taking a shower, when my dad decided to turn off the water to the house, run upstairs, and throw a bucket of freezing cold sludge into the shower with me. He wouldn't turn the water back on for 2 hours. FML
by Niles / 03/20/2012 at 1:46pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking back to my hotel from the town square, and got lost. I turned back and walked around town for an hour, freaking out and panicking. When I finally found the hotel, I realized it was practically a stone's throw from where I was when I turned around. FML
by Anonymous / 03/20/2012 at 12:50pm / Sweden (Orebro Lan) / Miscellaneous
Today, a bunch of my friends have been accepted to various colleges while I've been denied to the past 5. To cheer me up, my mom drove me to McDonald's. While we were in the drive-thru, she asked them if they had any job openings. FML
by pwib / 03/18/2012 at 3:07am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Taylor Easley / 03/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by disgusted / 03/16/2012 at 5:02am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was calling my husband while driving. While the phone rang, I farted. As soon as the horrid smell hit my nose, my husband answered. I panicked and hung up quickly, thinking to myself how embarrassed I was because he could smell it. I'm an idiot. FML
by StinkyandStupid / 03/15/2012 at 1:49pm / United States / Transportation
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…
- Today I got a question from a guest at work. I work as a scenic tour pilot and our airplanes have a… Today, I went over to my crush's house for the first time. Everything was going great until his dog… Today, I was at drama club, rehearsing for a play I'm in. But I had to leave early and so I went up…