samabomination

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samabomination

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1866
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 20 posted

About samabomination : I'm Sam and I love to write :) English is my best subject but I try not to be a grammar Nazi. I'm awful at drawing since I tend to get distracted easily.

samabomination's page activity

Visits<b>Jiratias</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 7:51am<b>Leo619</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 10:30pm<b>Iamentertained</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 5:23pm<b>DeadpoolBeast13</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 9:51pm<b>Damned_Architect</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 3:44am<b>joco4</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 12:50pm<b>csjc</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 8:54pm<b>dno79</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 9:14am<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:13pm<b>bradoiler</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 11:47pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 12:58am<b>BSIrishman</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 10:39pm<b>Bend0n</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:57am<b>Crazyjohnb</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 2:35pm<b>caspergirl17</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 1:30pm<b>Puffpie</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 1:33am<b>Ardeku</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 9:44am<b>imateapot_723</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:56pm

Fucked!<b>joco4</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 6:51pm

samabomination's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of samabomination's badges

samabomination's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to see my favorite band. It was all amazing and great until I decided to go crowd surfing. I was maybe too heavy because people jumped away instead of catching me. I fell right on my tailbone. FML

by lekijkerd / 11/17/2012 at 8:56am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health

Today, I was fired from my job. My boss turned to everyone and said, "Allow me to escort this trash out of the office." Everyone cheered. FML

by Unwanted / 08/02/2012 at 2:50am / United States (California) / Work

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

by Jacquelinez / 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

by coleslaw / 02/03/2012 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML

by scribbles1475 / 12/15/2011 at 12:00am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML

by Nicole557 / 11/03/2011 at 6:56am / United States / Animals

Today, in one fell swoop, my testicles and spirits were simultaneously crushed into submission by the girl I like. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 5:34pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my AP teacher once again accused me of plagiarism. Apparently the words "demise," "ultimately," and "rural," are too sophisticated for an 11th grade AP student to use and MUST have been copied from the Internet. FML

by dumbteacher / 05/23/2011 at 10:35am / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend walked in on me in the bathroom. That's how he found out that I wax my nipples. FML

by weezer / 02/21/2011 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

by seepeezy32 / 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm / Intimacy

Today, I fell down a flight of stairs. The guy behind me was kind enough to ask if I was okay. He then called his friends over so they could laugh at me. FML

by ValeyFallsAlot / 01/14/2011 at 9:18am / Health

Today, I got a text message from a number I didn't know telling me, "Fine. It's over, have a wonderful life." I've never had a girlfriend and now I get broken up with by girls I don't even know. FML

by dudezilla / 10/13/2009 at 11:52am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, one of my bosses came into work and told me that they had seen my dad's twin in the supermarket holding hands and kissing a much younger woman and her baby. My dad doesn't have a twin. FML

by tor / 07/09/2009 at 10:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend was complaining that we don't have "a song". Irritated, I told her that I'd put on the radio, and whatever song was playing was our song from now on. I switched on the radio, and "It's Not Fair" by Lily Allen was playing. Our song is about premature ejaculation. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2009 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Love