safaeita

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safaeita

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2151
  • Number of comments : 154
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About safaeita : ^^

safaeita's page activity

Visits<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/08/2016 at 2:12am<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 12:33am<b>Subtract</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 11:18pm<b>brian1976</b> - the 11/28/2016 at 10:41am<b>psychocunt</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 2:12am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 7:21am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 1:50pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 12:53am<b>IcedSapphire</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 4:01pm<b>RedCronos</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 3:21pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 11:46pm<b>kzarecor2019</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 7:54pm<b>AZTEC_WARRIOR</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:28pm<b>lizbeth26</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 8:55am<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 11:53am<b>amanda1472</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 2:23pm<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:50am<b>PurpleVixen</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 8:18am

Fucked!<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/08/2016 at 8:12am

safaeita's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of safaeita's badges

safaeita's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my dad why the Wi-fi was down. He just replied, "Why? Horno can't get no more porno?" No, "Horno" has an assignment. WTF? FML

by horno / 12/02/2015 at 3:18pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend heard a great quote about not letting anyone drag her down. She took it to mean, "break up with your boyfriend." FML

by GoldCyclone / 07/11/2015 at 1:47pm / United States (Iowa) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

by tulisa / 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, in a desperate attempt to get fired, I sent a sexual love letter to my boss. We're going on our first date tomorrow. FML

by fucked / 02/06/2015 at 3:06am / Singapore / Work

Today, the fire alarm keeps going off at my apartment. Not only is the noise ear-piercingly loud enough to wake the entire neighbourhood, there's also a big flashing red light in case the deafening sound isn't enough. This is my day off. It's going on all day. FML

by Shutup! / 10/31/2014 at 6:42am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

by stewardess / 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML

by up to no-good... / 08/22/2014 at 12:09am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. He wound up drinking a whole bottle of wine, and when the bill came he drunkenly yelled at the waiter, claiming it should be free, because he's in the military "fighting for your freedom". He's a mechanic in the National Guard. FML

by so embarrassed / 01/05/2013 at 4:56pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML

by almostkilledmyself / 12/29/2012 at 2:30am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

by mom / 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my dentist of four years. After the cleaning, the hygienist and I scheduled my next appointment, and she briefly left the room, leaving my file open on the computer. The data in a field called "NOTE" caught my eye: "Sissy. Freak. Always late. Ask about family or will flirt." FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2012 at 12:14am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my crazy mother-in-law threatened to camp out outside my house so she will "never get left out" of our lives, all because we called instead of sending a written invitation to my three-year-old's birthday party. I actually believe she's crazy enough to do it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2012 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mad at my parents and threatened to run away. Things got so bad that I packed a bag and left, planning to hide in my front yard to teach them a lesson. It's been two hours, and I'm still standing behind a bush in front of my house while they make no effort to look for me. FML

by Rowan Curry / 09/15/2012 at 11:37am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the car I got a great deal on a few days ago, needs a new transmission. I'm now the proud owner of a very large and very expensive paperweight. FML

by BuspassBob / 09/10/2012 at 12:48pm / United States / Money