Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sacrosanct2

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

sacrosanct2

7Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4252
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About sacrosanct2 : Nothing is sacred

sacrosanct2's page activity

Visits<b>yus</b> - 11 hours ago<b>besosforme</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:56am<b>taylorcheri</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:10pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 2:00am<b>IamHercules</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 1:59am<b>MCRbae</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 5:30pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 9:20pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:03pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 6:11am<b>TysonHolgate</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:07pm<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:14am<b>lex1459</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:35am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 4:33am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:32am<b>mommy2cassidy</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 10:49pm<b>quickit</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 8:01pm<b>alexmisty88</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 1:21am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 10:18am

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 9:10am<b>morondon000</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 8:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:03am<b>wisesombrero</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>lkfldal</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:43am<b>RocketmanWelbz</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:35pm<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:18am

sacrosanct2's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of sacrosanct2's badges

sacrosanct2's favorite FMLs

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13924) - you deserved it (43752)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned the hard way that leaving eye drops in your car all day makes them scorching hot. FML

#13367996
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11795) - you deserved it (35723)

On 10/08/2010 at 5:30pm - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

#13321339
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9782) - you deserved it (55607)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38216) - you deserved it (9657)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML

#12753768
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13743) - you deserved it (47938)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:32am - intimacy - by H8TR (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to watch a movie I hadn't seen before to bring my spirits up, as I've been feeling down lately. How did the movie end? Everybody died. FML

#12344215
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26911) - you deserved it (7823)

On 08/06/2010 at 1:12am - misc - by Shouldaknown (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38456) - you deserved it (10233)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my family and I went to the coast. Our dog was off the leash because we were the only people around. He was delighted to find a dead seal carcass and roll around in its remains. We then had a 3 hour drive home. FML

#11822589
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26670) - you deserved it (7907)

On 07/12/2010 at 1:38am - animals - by LexiBoBexi (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got called a "loser" by an old man wearing pink flip-flops and riding a purple moped. FML

#11586440
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35093) - you deserved it (7392)

On 07/01/2010 at 11:19am - misc - by cooldude (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was expecting a call from my friend. The phone rang and I answered with "WANK!!" as a joke. It wasn't my friend on the phone, it was my boss. FML

#10132808
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9130) - you deserved it (40159)

On 04/25/2010 at 6:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I waked in on my boyfriend and his best friend playing "Dick Wars" while wearing glow in the dark condoms. FML

#9416886
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49076) - you deserved it (9621)

On 03/27/2010 at 4:26am - intimacy - by pumpkinlover89 - United States (California)

Today, I realised that my staff doesn't take me seriously. I walked in on my chef, who had just spent an hour and half a block of cheese carving cheddar goggles for himself. When I confronted him, he pulled up his t-shirt to reveal a cocktail sausage taped to his stomach. FML

#8819717
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20116) - you deserved it (5225)

On 03/04/2010 at 7:43am - work - by Garry (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, a wasp flew into my room. While I, a 6'2" hockey player, cowered in the corner, my 4'11" girlfriend killed it. FML

#8770884
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9613) - you deserved it (37734)

On 03/02/2010 at 10:53am - animals - by Jeff - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

#8743976
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35624) - you deserved it (2371)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: