About rougeunicorn03 : Um.. Hi. I can't believe someone is actually looking at my profile. Well I like My Little Pony, How I Met your Mother, anime, puppies and kitties, and also taking naps. Thanks for visiting my profile. Message me if you'd like.
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rougeunicorn03's favorite FMLs
Today, my teacher was talking about anorexia and bulimia. Midway through the lesson, she stopped and knowingly asked if I wanted to share my experiences with the class. I don't have an eating disorder, just a screwed-up metabolism. FML
by 94lbs of muscle / 10/02/2013 at 2:37pm / Health
Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML
by Anonymous / 02/19/2013 at 1:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids
Today, it's been 5 years I've been working for a man that won't admit he has Tourette's. He sits at his desk, twitching his head and hissing like a snake. He's also randomly said things like 'nipples', 'Jessica Simpson', 'potato peeler', etc. I feel like it's become my job to warn new employees. FML
by ShakeRattleHiss / 04/20/2011 at 11:25am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by puggles / 01/03/2011 at 1:52am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML
by Anonymous / 08/12/2010 at 12:00am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my entire family thinks I have no friends, am expressionless (to quote, "a robot") and that my monotonous voice hints at the suppressed depression hidden deep inside me. According to them, I need psychic evaluation. It all came out at a family reunion. FML
by talhabilal / 03/11/2010 at 9:28am / Pakistan (Punjab) / Miscellaneous
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- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…