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rockne93

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rockne93
  • Town/Country : Tawas, Michigan
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 273
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About rockne93 : Deep down, I hate the Internet

rockne93's last visitors

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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rockne93's favorite FMLs

Today, I sang "happy birthday" to my best friend. Sadly, it was while waitressing at work, where they were having a celebration I hadn't been invited to in the first place. FML

#21024621
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48524) - you deserved it (3385)

On 01/11/2014 at 3:26pm - misc - by left out - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was my first day at my new job. Not only does everyone hate me for replacing a guy they all liked, I managed to clog the only functional toilet there. The glares and threatening head-shaking they keep doing probably means I'm screwed. FML

#21023700
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38090) - you deserved it (5023)

On 01/10/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by shite (man) - United Kingdom

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

#21015899
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40177) - you deserved it (7591) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm - misc - by Elisa_LmR (woman) - France

Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML

#21008500
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40307) - you deserved it (2973)

On 12/28/2013 at 5:34pm - health - by worstwaytodumpagirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Harrow)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47751) - you deserved it (3833)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML

#20985907
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44019) - you deserved it (2850)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter excitedly told me about a new diet she read about online. Apparently, the diet entirely consists of bottled water and a mixture of food coloring. The food coloring "takes care of all that vitamin and mineral stuff." My daughter is an idiot. FML

#20985898
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43310) - you deserved it (6407)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:52am - kids - by Nofoodcoloringisnotasubstituteforfood (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I learned that when your mom threatens to embarrass you by singing in public, the wrong response is, "Yeah? I dare you." FML

Today, after being stood up at a diner, I called the girl who was supposed to have met me. Turns out, she thought I was kidding when I asked her out. FML

#20893951
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40351) - you deserved it (2784)

On 09/24/2013 at 1:16am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, while I was working, someone came in and attempted to purchase GTA 5 with a medical marijuana card. FML

#20892589
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (2596)

On 09/23/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27210) - you deserved it (82783)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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