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Offline (the 09/17/2016 at 11:41pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 23 December 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2324
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About rkdstp1995 : Hullo! I'm a 20 year old musician and geek from Canada. I play guitar, drums, piano and more. You can usually find me with a book in my face, or playing Zelda and Fallout. I do fire protection for work. Send a message if you wanna chat!

Favourite bands are Pearl Jam, Big Wreck, Our Lady Peace, Soundgarden, Alice in Chains, Black Sabbath, Cage the Elephant, Sublime, Metallica, Iron Maiden, and lots more. Ian Fletcher Thornley is the greatest guitarist in the world if anyone wanted to know...

Married as of April 22, 2016

rkdstp1995's page activity

Visits<b>whatahatuis</b> - yesterday at 8:14am<b>Oliveisthenewora</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 7:55pm<b>2simz</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 2:19am<b>thenightraven</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 2:46am<b>MyssTryss</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 7:19pm<b>Kataclysm97</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:06am<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:53pm<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 9:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 6:52pm<b>datdrumchick_32</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 8:48pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 9:57am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 7:06pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:50pm<b>sabby7</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 1:06am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 11:05pm<b>LPac5295</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 12:33am<b>capper44</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:23am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 11:04pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 7:34pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 6:17am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:04am<b>breekittenmitten</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:50pm<b>Anais457</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 11:06am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 5:33am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 6:39am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 1:54am<b>littlepiglola</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:26am<b>fallenkilljoy</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:54pm<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 6:24pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 4:46am<b>Kataclysm97</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:40pm<b>ILikeKoalas</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:03am<b>skymachine</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 7:31am<b>photogirl17</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 3:29am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 5:50pm<b>latinablanca</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 4:36am

rkdstp1995's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of rkdstp1995's badges

rkdstp1995's favorite FMLs

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, I had my first threesome. It was me, my wonderful girlfriend, and her shithead cat after he decided my balls were a bag of catnip and just had to play with. Things ended pretty fast. FML

by OnlyAvailableID / 02/08/2015 at 3:35am / Australia / Animals

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

by Lisa / 12/15/2014 at 10:38pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2014 at 10:37am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

by jay-frey96 / 11/02/2014 at 10:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

by too good / 10/24/2014 at 6:54am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2014 at 11:47am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, I'm at that age where sitting down carries a 50/50 chance of turning my balls into scrambled eggs, a fact confirmed yet again today. Third time this week. I think it's time to switch to briefs. FML

by I need a new ballsack. / 09/16/2014 at 12:20pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Health

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2014 at 1:44am / United States (Ohio) / Geek

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople / 08/11/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation / 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health