About rjc490 : Just living life and pondering what path to take next.
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rjc490's favorite FMLs
Today, I've been begging my boyfriend to get us a dog for months now. This morning, I noticed he'd bought some toilet paper with dogs printed on it. I asked him if it was a sign. He replied, "Yeah, one you can stick up your ass." FML
by Confession / 05/15/2016 at 10:07pm / Belgium / Animals
by captainuniverse / 05/14/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
by Erbtosis / 05/12/2016 at 10:40pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I offered my friend $150 to drop my girl and me off for at the airport. He's poor, so I try to help him out by paying for rides. My girl being with me, I asked him not to smoke weed while driving. He turned down the job because he needs a minimum of two blunts for the trip. FML
by echo / 05/11/2016 at 2:59pm / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by unboned / 05/11/2016 at 1:30pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/11/2016 at 11:53am / United States (Michigan) / Money
Today, a woman kindly asked if she might take a photo of her son in our cowboy boots. Thinking it couldn't do much harm, I agreed. Ten minutes later there was a butt naked three year-old and his entire family taking pictures in my shoe store. My manager wasn't impressed. FML
by jasonvanr / 05/10/2016 at 4:19am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work
Today, I was helping a customer find some shoes. When I brought her a size, she got a phone call. I motioned to the shoes and mouthed, "Bigger size" so I didn't interrupt her. She yelled, "Give me a fucking minute," and stormed out. About 5 minutes later, I realized she'd stolen the shoes. FML
by Saxicolous / 05/08/2016 at 8:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, my wife is so determined to keep me on my diet that, as I'm off work for the next week, she has gotten rid of all the food in the house. She has also taken the phones and iPads so I can't order a takeaway, and taken all my trousers so I can't walk to the shops. FML
by hungry hungry harvey / 05/08/2016 at 12:56pm / United States / Health
by seriouslydad / 05/08/2016 at 9:11am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by JustMarried / 05/07/2016 at 5:47pm / Ukraine / Intimacy
by jameen / 05/07/2016 at 7:48am / United Kingdom (West Berkshire) / Intimacy
Today, my class went for a hike through the woods near our school to destress during finals. While walking downhill towards the edge of the lake, I tripped and tumbled down the hill, and ended up diving head first into the lake. I had to hike back to the school soaking wet. FML
by SuperWhoMarvLock / 05/05/2016 at 9:35pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/04/2016 at 10:15am / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Kids
Today, the family I was serving had ordered calamari and when I brought out the food, they started yelling at me because apparently their daughter was allergic to it. Just why would you order it then? FML
by why / 05/02/2016 at 4:08pm / United States (Ohio) / Work