ribbons

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Offline (the 05/20/2015 at 12:41pm)

ribbons

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 10 May 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2742
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About ribbons : FML moderation: procrastination fodder for ever - and all time!

I make a face like my avatar *every* time someone doesn't capitalize proper nouns or use apostrophes in an otherwise hilarious submission. STOP BREAKING MY HEART!

ribbons's page activity

Visits<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 8:01am<b>JustShootMeFML</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:40am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 3:04am<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 2:07pm<b>ThomasBombadil</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 8:43pm<b>Chokobolt</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 3:58pm<b>turtles4life</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 3:51pm<b>Owlfarm612</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:58pm<b>obsolol</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 4:44am<b>JokerJim2013</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 3:20pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 2:06pm<b>RubbarDuckie</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 7:42am<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 8:26pm<b>birdierising</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 5:27pm<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 8:59pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 10:08am<b>LittlestPrincess</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 7:00am<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/14/2013 at 5:54pm

ribbons's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of ribbons's badges

ribbons's favorite FMLs

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

by Lunazel93 / 10/22/2012 at 12:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I got a phone call from my 6-year-old son's school telling me they were concerned about him as he wouldn't stop barking at the radiator. After talking to my husband about it, I found out he's been teaching him so he could see the look on my face. FML

by Uproar / 10/17/2012 at 7:00pm / Iceland / Kids

Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2012 at 1:03pm / Estonia / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

by Failed Parent / 10/11/2012 at 2:59am / United States / Kids

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

by assholecat / 10/10/2012 at 4:43am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML

by Skidmark Sally / 10/07/2012 at 5:41pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

Today, at work, my boss asked me why I wasn't adhering to proper dress code. I pointed out that skinny jeans are in the dress code, to which he replied, "Only if you're skinny." FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 12:40pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2012 at 7:36am / United States (Delaware) / Health

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

by Leashaness / 09/15/2012 at 7:07am / United States / Health

Today, I discovered why the milk in my house has a funny, sweet taste. My family has been pouring the leftover milk from their cereal back into the carton. FML

by spekledworf / 08/27/2012 at 10:57pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML

by Marjorie / 07/13/2012 at 1:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my car broke down and had to be towed to the dealership. Normally, this would be just unlucky but I work with kids and we had been fundraising for charity. I am now sitting at the dealership with my hair coloured purple, red and blue and in ridiculously high pigtails while people stare. FML

by straightlyconfused / 05/27/2012 at 9:20am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

by Grindyloo / 05/05/2012 at 6:06am / Kids

Today, my dad found out that there is a free, 24 hour, 7 days a week religious channel. Now that's all he watches. FML

by awwman / 04/09/2012 at 10:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous