reeldag

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reeldag

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 708
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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reeldag's page activity

Visits<b>daringtoride</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 6:00pm<b>fuzzy101606</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 6:21am<b>zpelks</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 3:21am<b>outoftown</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 2:06am<b>Misswildsides</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 11:59am<b>challan</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 9:56am<b>sourgirl101</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 2:32am<b>kristena103</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 11:54pm<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 10:18am

Fucked!<b>daringtoride</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 12:00am

reeldag's FML badges

50 favourites

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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reeldag's favorite FMLs

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

by f.a.t. / 10/04/2013 at 4:20am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my parents wearing Santa hats and blasting Christmas music at full volume. So begins three months of hell. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 3:08pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 6:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I learned that my parrots now can shit horizontally when I found the wall next to the cage covered in feces. FML

by StefanKa / 09/09/2013 at 5:30am / Poland (Mazowieckie) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have to get an ultrasound at the hospital. In order to get a clear picture, I need to have a full bladder. I've been waiting my turn for 2 hours now, desperately needing to pee. There are still multiple patients ahead of me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 5:58pm / Mexico / Health

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 12:26am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Health

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML

by mcdonalds / 08/06/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Health

Today, I noticed fraudulent charges made in Florida that nearly drained my bank account. After reporting the fraud to the bank, I returned home from a weekend away to find a note from my husband. He and his mistress have run off to Florida to start a life together, apparently at my expense. FML

by brokeandalone / 07/30/2013 at 1:09am / United States / Money

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

by JustSomeGuy / 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

by turning red / 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I were having a fight, when she grabbed my car keys and threw them over into the neighbors overgrown junk yard. My car is a restored '59 Belvedere and the keys can't be replaced. I've been looking for hours and I still can't find them. FML

by ronnieG / 07/16/2013 at 12:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

by yeshehaspornaddiction / 07/02/2013 at 12:37am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months broke up with me after finding out that I reload my own shotgun shells and I shoot competitively. His reasoning? He didn't want to date a "cheap and dangerous woman." Seriously? FML