redblueflame

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Offline (the 06/19/2016 at 5:02am)

redblueflame

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 July 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6802
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About redblueflame : Just a girl who enjoys funny things. What else do you need to know ? :)

redblueflame's page activity

Visits<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 10:24am<b>Xxbeardsley</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:28am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:14pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:17am<b>draftskink</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 1:40am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 2:01am<b>Scarface408</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:01pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:57am<b>marko1596</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:00pm<b>hellopenny</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 2:23pm<b>kiante99</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 5:19pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:27am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:22am<b>Epiccake</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:06pm<b>jeffandjeff</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 11:02pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 12:54pm<b>GripItRight</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:12pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:03am

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 6:27am

redblueflame's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of redblueflame's badges

redblueflame's favorite FMLs

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm / Spain (Comunidad Valenciana) / Animals

Today, my sweet 7-month-old puppy ran up to a big fat dog at the park and did what she always does: roll over on her back to start to play. The big fat dog lifted his leg and peed all over my puppy's belly. After the shock, my soaking wet puppy jumped on me. FML

by Pisser / 06/26/2014 at 12:57am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

by stopinthenameoflove / 06/19/2014 at 10:37am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, I went to CVS to buy some tampons. The cashier said, "Ewwww... You're on your period." FML

by gracezering / 06/17/2014 at 7:45am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I bought some crickets as a treat for my lizard. One escaped and somehow got into the heating system in my room. The chirping is amplified and comes from everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Goodbye, restful sleep. FML

by Sleepdeprived / 06/10/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Maine) / Animals

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML

by blanknameisblank / 06/09/2014 at 3:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

by 404: sense not found / 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

by yepintheladiesroom / 06/07/2014 at 5:37pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. It was going well until I accidentally passed gas. To add to the embarrassment, he rated it. I only got a 4 out of 10. FML

by embarrassed girl / 06/07/2014 at 1:40am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML

by shartface12 / 06/06/2014 at 6:01pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

by disturbed / 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm / Ireland / Animals

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

by half-dead in CA / 05/31/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I snuck out of the house to go to a party. When I got back later, I tried climbing back up the rope-ladder I'd set up earlier, leading back through my bedroom window. I was halfway up when it broke free. I sprained both my ankles and had to shamefully ring the doorbell to get back in. FML

by groundedasfuck / 05/24/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving home, some idiot kept tailgating me, so I slowed down, hoping he'd overtake me. He didn't, so I pulled to the side of the road. He did the same, in front of me. He kept toying with me until I crashed into another car trying to speed away from him. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2014 at 6:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation