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redblueflame

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redblueflame
  • Town/Country : Tampa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 July 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1181
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About redblueflame : Just a girl who enjoys funny things. What else do you need to know ? :)

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That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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redblueflame's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42333) - you deserved it (3686)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's little brother challenged me to a water gun fight. I accepted, not knowing he was going to fill his gun with vinegar, then shoot me in the eyes with it. FML

#21111233
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36845) - you deserved it (3570)

On 04/12/2014 at 3:59pm - kids - by BeatByA9yrold (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

#21111156
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32224) - you deserved it (7546)

On 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I borrowed my friend's car to go deliver a tent I sold online. His possessive girlfriend tailed me, not knowing I was driving. She then rear-ended me when I stopped, thinking I was her man, and was cheating. When she realized the situation, she accused me of hiding him. FML

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

#21100295
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39159) - you deserved it (16428)

On 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm - kids - by and not even in the good way (man) - United States

Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML

#21100221
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40839) - you deserved it (2962)

On 03/30/2014 at 2:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44391) - you deserved it (6059)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had a music duet in front of a crowd and 3 judges. I play tuba and my partner plays the saxophone. He burst out laughing in the middle of it because one note that I played sounded like a fart. FML

#21082619
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36953) - you deserved it (3797)

On 03/09/2014 at 10:09pm - misc - by some band player - United States (Illinois)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

#21081466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45244) - you deserved it (8510)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40090) - you deserved it (3727)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to the arcade with my dad, and we decided to try out the hurricane simulator, which blasts 60mph air around in an enclosed space. My dad farted halfway through. FML

#21066497
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42127) - you deserved it (4476)

On 02/20/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by begging for air - United States (Oregon)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML

#21062639
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17592) - you deserved it (41834)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:44pm - kids - by lyss - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I have Hello Kitty band-aids on my nips because I dozed off while tanning and burned them extra crispy. FML

#21062623
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20527) - you deserved it (36705)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by extra crispy or original recipe (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49060) - you deserved it (4610)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)



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