rallets

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Offline (the 03/21/2016 at 3:43am)

rallets

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 31283
  • Number of comments : 1536
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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rallets's page activity

Visits<b>TheGothGamerGirl</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 10:49pm<b>MaskedFlame259</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:21am<b>addixkay</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 3:00pm<b>freyday</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:49pm<b>xoxchelaxox08</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 1:40am<b>car116</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:19pm<b>EijiNeko</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:29pm<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 12:43pm<b>tinyrosie</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 1:29pm<b>brivielle</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 3:03pm<b>marleypuckpuck</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:04am<b>frankiero</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 7:11pm<b>Iogic</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 10:56pm<b>lasada12</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 10:28pm<b>cjwayy</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 2:04am<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 5:43pm<b>MandyMeow</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:44am<b>alyoopz</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 10:20pm

rallets's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of rallets's badges

rallets's favorite FMLs

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2012 at 12:51am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

by Matthew / 11/26/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, the first snow of the season fell. My husband celebrated by pelting me with snowballs, while I was on the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2011 at 2:08pm / United States / Love

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2011 at 2:55am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

by xoccerplaya / 10/06/2011 at 6:46am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

by Pookaa / 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

by Ramis182 / 10/03/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML

by anonymous / 10/01/2011 at 10:18am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 10:04am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm / United States / Work

Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 6:26am / Singapore / Love

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years said she was leaving me because recently I wasn't making much money, and was playing too many video games. I recently got a raise at my job of 5 years. The job? Testing video games. FML

by Eric Moore / 09/25/2011 at 4:12am / United States (Texas) / Love