Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 556
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

purplemango's page activity

Visits<b>theaccountant</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 4:55pm<b>zee8</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:18pm<b>Rectov</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 7:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 7:27am<b>satansfuckbuddy</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 2:06am<b>blondie9</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 4:40pm<b>buddy560</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 2:11pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:33am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 2:22pm<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 10:01am<b>terryaly</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:56am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:52am<b>Kitty19</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 9:10pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 8:53pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 8:44pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:32am<b>tckma</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 6:04am<b>ilovecuddling</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 4:29pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:37pm

purplemango's FML badges


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of purplemango's badges

purplemango's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave a group presentation. Because I didn't know the last names of my group members, I'd put fake ones in, intending to replace them later. I forgot to change them and I ended up giving a presentation alongside a very angry Greg Penishead and Josh Acne. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12731) - you deserved it (26220)

On 11/12/2015 at 11:55am - misc - by friendless1004 - United States (California)

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (2939)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30254) - you deserved it (3603)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50049) - you deserved it (7119)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37906) - you deserved it (9243)

On 07/13/2014 at 10:10pm - animals - by dogggg (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51307) - you deserved it (25466)

On 07/19/2013 at 9:54am - work - by Treats For Days - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29266) - you deserved it (7481)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after a drunken New Year's Eve party with friends, I woke up with a penis on my cheek. It wasn't a drawing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (4517) - you deserved it (1440) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/02/2013 at 6:15am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument; however, his new-found passion for hardcore rapping meant that he tried to "diss" me using bad rhymes and ill thought-out putdowns. It was ridiculous, and didn't really make any sense, so I started giggling. He stormed off, grumbling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22137) - you deserved it (2725)

On 09/26/2012 at 5:06am - love - by Popscene (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said "nah, it's just a generic face". FML


I agree, your life sucks (22463) - you deserved it (10066)

On 08/15/2012 at 1:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27013) - you deserved it (7317)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML


I agree, your life sucks (7921) - you deserved it (33268)

On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: