pureportedpear

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pureportedpear

43Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 June 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3449
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About pureportedpear : Just send me a message if you want to talk, or if you need a reccomendation on a anime/manga/manwha and I might be able to help you. Got a few books too but not as many

pureportedpear's page activity

Visits<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 7:45am<b>apexalex</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 11:19pm<b>laurenada</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 4:28pm<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 6:15pm<b>happypenguins</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 1:19am<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 7:42pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 5:55pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 5:54pm<b>That_One_Guy123</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 4:06am<b>kewwy</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 2:44pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 8:26pm<b>Rimsc</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 9:02pm<b>Sansa_Kroma</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 9:42pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 1:22pm<b>RandomJam124</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 5:41pm<b>demix</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 2:34pm<b>sabby7</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 3:01pm<b>kimmieee54</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 2:18am

Fucked!<b>chickypie1987</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 7:56pm<b>Emma1562</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 3:52am<b>pmore04</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 9:55am<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 11:56pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 10:10pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:14am<b>misfit_14_</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:20pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:16pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:06pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:09am<b>Sansa_Kroma</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:40am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 1:20am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 8:02pm<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 2:51pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 5:09am<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:10pm<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:44pm<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:19am

pureportedpear's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of pureportedpear's badges

pureportedpear's favorite FMLs

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

by peceout / 12/02/2014 at 3:48am / Sweden (Hallands Lan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wife and I drove two hours from our rural town to buy a new sofa. When we got home, it took us an hour to figure out there was no way to fit it through our door. We made the two hour drive back to return it, only to find the store was closed. FML

by davy0540 / 11/30/2014 at 1:09am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

by anotherhuman / 11/30/2014 at 12:48am / United States (Florida) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

by grossedout / 10/31/2014 at 8:39pm / Love

Today, as I was walking home from work, I got chased halfway home by a wolf. Yes, a wolf. I live in central Norway. FML

by noxiffic / 10/31/2014 at 8:31am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

by John / 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

by badplacerightnow / 10/13/2014 at 10:15am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while walking to work, I found out what it feels like to be hit in the face by a rolled up newspaper thrown from the window of a moving car by a paper boy doing his rounds. It hit hard enough to give me a black eye. FML

by newswithabitofbite / 08/28/2014 at 6:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

by Anonymous / 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

by whoops / 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML

by baconistasty27 / 08/01/2014 at 1:33am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Health