prettyinpunk1025

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Offline (the 02/19/2015 at 4:00am)

prettyinpunk1025

3Fucked!

prettyinpunk1025
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 October 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6651
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About prettyinpunk1025 : Hey the name is Sam... If you want to know anything about me, or just want to chat, send me a message. Although I'm usually on the app, so it may take me a while to respond.

prettyinpunk1025's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 12:33am<b>PinkaLotaPoka</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 8:50pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 11:20am<b>FMLollipop</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 7:31am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 1:02pm<b>bazookajoey</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 11:01pm<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 9:59pm<b>jacksonpm23</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 3:25am<b>llwad0717</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:02pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:24pm<b>MdMan2</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:01pm<b>ppajeihdn</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 11:59am<b>Necropool</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:44am<b>CynicallyAlive</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 11:11am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 12:55am<b>kannan4</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 8:47pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:50pm<b>loueasy</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 10:57pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 10:31pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:25am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 6:55am

prettyinpunk1025's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of prettyinpunk1025's badges

prettyinpunk1025's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

by Anon. / 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

by stupiddrunk / 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML

by notagoodsign / 02/28/2011 at 5:55am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

by TheKingDavis / 02/14/2011 at 2:11am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

by theish / 02/04/2011 at 9:08am / Intimacy

Today, while snow plowing I accidentally ran over my kid's basketball. I told him what had happened and he responded by spilling his ant farm into my underwear drawer. FML

by Anonymous / 01/13/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, was my boyfriends last night visiting my family. My dog decided to go through the trash, then ran up to my dad with one of our used condoms caught on her teeth. My parents didn't even know we were sleeping in the same room. They know a lot more now. FML

by ash / 01/04/2011 at 4:09pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML

by LoveMyNewBro / 01/04/2011 at 5:56am / Intimacy

Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML

by hotmommy / 12/19/2010 at 7:23pm / Intimacy

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML

by Heyy / 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML

by sydysyd / 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend asked how I could go to the bathroom and leave my tampon in at the same time. He didn't realize there are two separate holes. He's 28. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2010 at 9:49am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2010 at 2:47am / Kids