About prettyinpunk1025 : Hey the name is Sam... If you want to know anything about me, or just want to chat, send me a message. Although I'm usually on the app, so it may take me a while to respond.
prettyinpunk1025's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
prettyinpunk1025's favorite FMLs
by belieber101 / 03/17/2012 at 8:45am / United Kingdom (Bedfordshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I gave in and let my friend give me a makeover. She couldn't find my eyelash curler, but decided that if she used scissors lightly, it would work just the same. Needless to say, it did not work. FML
by neveragain / 03/16/2012 at 1:11am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML
by Rissa Warrington / 03/09/2012 at 3:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
by BOOP / 02/17/2012 at 8:25am / United States (Montana) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I dropped my bag to run after my two year old who had bolted in the parking lot. Once he was in his seat, I got in and drove away. I felt two large thumps as I drove over my own iPad, cellphone and wallet. FML
by ray / 02/16/2012 at 1:36pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML
by amythest / 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Kids
Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML
by screwed / 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health
by Cpt Colin / 01/03/2012 at 2:17am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
by anne / 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Christina / 12/05/2011 at 12:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Money
by aninnocentonlooker / 12/04/2011 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by jzappe / 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
by maniac11 / 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by octoberrain / 10/10/2011 at 7:16pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
- Today, I learned that removing your boyfriends boxers with your teeth is waaaay less sexy when you… Today, my father decided that since he's paying for my flat, he will use it twice a week to have it… Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk…