Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

poppyseed420

Offline (the 08/04/2015 at 10:52am) | Search for a member

poppyseed420

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 July 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1585
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

poppyseed420's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:59pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 10:04pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 2:38am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:45pm<b>bmmondi95</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 9:15pm<b>Odao</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 7:13pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:10pm<b>blakebit</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:18pm<b>persianninja</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:44am<b>yellowchocobo</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 4:28pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 3:33pm<b>parism143</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:04pm<b>iLike2Teabag</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 5:03am<b>BiGBoYWaNTsSoDa</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 12:14am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 1:54am<b>ipodtouchgirl</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 10:36pm<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 11:21pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 10:25am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:59am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:38am

poppyseed420's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of poppyseed420's badges

poppyseed420's favorite FMLs

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33900) - you deserved it (4529)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML

#21312200
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27592) - you deserved it (13941)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:32pm - animals - by sting - United States (California)

Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck my hands out the window to let them dry. When I pulled my hands back in there were live bugs stuck in my nail polish. FML

#21228488
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24461) - you deserved it (47325)

On 08/03/2014 at 2:49pm - misc - by ew - United States (Texas)

Today, I got fired from my job. Why? Apparently taking 10 minutes to take a shit is too long for some people. FML

#21219077
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44333) - you deserved it (8325)

On 07/24/2014 at 5:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55573) - you deserved it (18301)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML

#21165218
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24481) - you deserved it (41092)

On 06/06/2014 at 6:01pm - health - by shartface12 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

#21165186
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49954) - you deserved it (5757)

On 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm - health - by FMyBrain (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45227) - you deserved it (6550)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML

#20991588
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52745) - you deserved it (4848)

On 12/13/2013 at 7:34pm - intimacy - by puking now (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while swimming in the ocean, I felt some sand under my wedding ring. I took it off for a second, and got hit by a huge wave. My ring is now lost somewhere in the ocean. FML

#20961838
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30666) - you deserved it (40472)

On 11/18/2013 at 4:14am - misc - by smiley1014 (man) - United States

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45060) - you deserved it (3015)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: