About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog is part reindeer, part fox.
plaguer's FML badges
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
plaguer's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML
by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by Wallz99 / 04/19/2013 at 2:00am / Pakistan (Azad Kashmir) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 1:39am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Gurior / 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm / Canada / Intimacy
Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML
by MissedTheBoat / 04/14/2013 at 3:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by SoreNips / 04/12/2013 at 7:57pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML
by Anonymous / 04/10/2013 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML
by maturity / 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML
by me / 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/03/2013 at 9:32am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love
by amberrenee91 / 03/18/2013 at 11:29pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by noooooooo / 03/17/2013 at 8:10pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love