plaguer

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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12119
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog's name is Bowser.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>Alup132</b> - 14 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 7:59pm<b>Oliveisthenewora</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 1:55am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 12:36am<b>ChromeVIP</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 7:32pm<b>baileybutler</b> - the 09/12/2016 at 2:44am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 4:52pm<b>11InchesLook</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 12:10pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 9:01pm<b>thatguy1531</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 11:25pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 10:46pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 10:45pm<b>gorgonkiller15</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 9:01pm<b>mfaizsiddiqui</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:49am<b>jackthekeeper</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:11am<b>zipJohn</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 1:23pm<b>superhuman16</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 5:16am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 3:40am

Fucked!<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 11:05pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 10:52pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 4:45am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 11:24pm<b>Cocoapelli</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 8:59pm<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 11:18pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 10:03am<b>Jonjon554</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:20am<b>alex_gen</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 9:03pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:28pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:48pm<b>sugarshugar</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:29pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:29pm<b>tengo</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:29am<b>prophetsam</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:38pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:20am<b>SpawnofAthena</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:51am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:53pm

plaguer's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of plaguer's badges

plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML

by Urinator / 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm / United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross) / Animals

Today, my rarely-romantic boyfriend finally said "I love you". Too bad he was drunk, and was talking to my vagina. FML

by Queen LaQueefah / 09/13/2015 at 7:52am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML

by princeronron / 09/07/2015 at 10:02pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Animals

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

by clutzirella / 08/07/2015 at 2:32am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

by funnnyyyyy -_- / 08/01/2015 at 4:29am / Nepal / Animals

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

by strangely / 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML

by dirtbikeguy / 07/23/2015 at 9:05am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I went out to inspect the backyard. There are now more than two dozen spiders hanging out and webs crossing from one side of the yard to the other. I have decided to surrender this territory. FML

by Skoff / 07/23/2015 at 5:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

by Julianapilikusplatosophophes / 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm getting over a nasty breakup, and decided to treat myself and order a pizza online. After waiting 45 minutes, I checked the site. Turns out, I'd forgotten to change the address on the site. I sent my ex a free pizza. FML

by sad and hungry / 06/06/2015 at 10:37am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I walked outside to get the paper, and saw a dying bird I assumed had flown into the window. It was warm so I thought it might still be alive. I wasn't wearing my glasses though, and was trying to nurse a dog turd back to life. FML

by nerderer / 06/04/2015 at 10:17pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML

by Swabidizop / 05/18/2015 at 4:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous