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plaguer

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plaguerplaguer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10318
  • Number of comments : 172
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About plaguer : Part time barista, tattoo parlor rest of the time. My dog is part reindeer, part fox.

plaguer's page activity

Visits<b>manuelg1095</b> - 9 hours ago<b>HelloKiittyy</b> - 15 hours ago<b>sdlr32787</b> - 16 hours ago<b>alex_gen</b> - 20 hours ago<b>AnOriginalName</b> - 24 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 9:29am<b>Sandman0351</b> - yesterday at 9:10am<b>OmgimBored</b> - yesterday at 8:54am<b>alphasmartass93</b> - yesterday at 8:48am<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 8:25am<b>jbuiel123</b> - yesterday at 7:51am<b>frankmz</b> - yesterday at 7:50am<b>pedinhuh</b> - yesterday at 7:41am<b>oomph</b> - yesterday at 7:37am<b>Tripartita</b> - yesterday at 7:31am<b>majoroftheair</b> - yesterday at 12:03am<b>sugarshugar</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 1:29pm<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 9:51am

Fucked!<b>alex_gen</b> - 14 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 20 hours ago<b>alphasmartass93</b> - 20 hours ago<b>sugarshugar</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:29pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 2:29pm<b>tengo</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 6:29am<b>prophetsam</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 7:38pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:20am<b>SpawnofAthena</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:51am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:53pm<b>FFStepchild283</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 6:53am<b>DrSirSexyLegs</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:22am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 5:27pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 7:05pm<b>emilyh7689</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 3:07am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 6:43pm<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 4:12pm<b>emmarawr17</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 8:24pm

plaguer's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of plaguer's badges

plaguer's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my girlfriend actually slept with one of the celebrities on her "5 celebrities we're allowed to sleep with" list. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2016 at 7:51am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I was babysitting. As I went to leave the bathroom, someone grabbed the knob and pulled the door shut. I figured it was one of the kids and told them to knock it off. A second later, the grip let off. There was no one there and the kids were still asleep. I don't know what to think. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2015 at 11:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife knelt down in front me to give me a blowjob. As she took my underwear off a moth flew out of them. I've got no idea how it got there but I was cock-blocked by a moth. FML

by Moth_Balled / 12/14/2015 at 11:50pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, my six-year-old son told me how it was funny that there's "a food chicken and an animal chicken". That's going to be a fun one to explain to him. FML

by sydcaller618 / 11/23/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids

Today, I did such a bad job explaining the recent change from daylight savings time, that my 5-year-old son is now convinced that we're time travellers. FML

by badmom / 11/06/2015 at 12:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML

by Gassy / 09/21/2015 at 10:45am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML

by Urinator / 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm / United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross) / Animals

Today, my rarely-romantic boyfriend finally said "I love you". Too bad he was drunk, and was talking to my vagina. FML

by Queen LaQueefah / 09/13/2015 at 7:52am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML

by princeronron / 09/07/2015 at 10:02pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Animals

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

by clutzirella / 08/07/2015 at 2:32am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

by funnnyyyyy -_- / 08/01/2015 at 4:29am / Nepal / Animals

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

by strangely / 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Intimacy