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phew's favorite FMLs
by youredisgusting / 10/03/2014 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Ryuun12 / 10/02/2014 at 11:20pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by stewardess / 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Sorry / 10/02/2014 at 7:51pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML
by mykodu / 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, in the men's room a guy using the adjacent toilet dropped his phone, and it fell right next to my foot. The screen was facing upward, and looked like he was taking pictures of his junk in the office toilet. FML
by Vkaz / 10/02/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I thought I was finally over my anxiety problem, and confidently went to my first ever job interview. Halfway through, the manager tells me that if I didn't stop being so nervous, he couldn't give me the job. I cried. FML
by rejected / 10/02/2014 at 4:56am / United Kingdom (Essex) / Work
Today, my best friend, who I've been in love with for nearly a decade, asked me to help him set up an online dating profile. During our 4-hour conversation, as he waded through the profiles, he complained that it was impossible for him to find a girl to have a meaningful conversation with. FML
by EosThorn / 10/01/2014 at 9:33pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Love
by notatherapist / 10/01/2014 at 7:08pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Intimacy
Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
by ThatNewCarSmell / 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by Potforapeso / 09/30/2014 at 10:30pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, my Spanish teacher told me that the reason the girl I'm tutoring hasn't contacted me yet is because she emailed the teacher saying she didn't like my name, therefore she didn't want me to be her tutor. FML
by Hi, I'm Heather / 09/30/2014 at 10:05pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2014 at 7:42pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by mindjob / 09/28/2014 at 10:49pm / Love
Today, I'm on the last day of my honeymoon in Ireland. My wife and I have an amazing hotel room and a huge bed. She's passed out drunk and if I even touch her, she needs the bucket next to our bed. So much for finishing our week on a "fun" note. FML
by superman21 / 09/28/2014 at 6:55pm / Ireland / Love