About phew : These are words.
phew's FML badges
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
phew's favorite FMLs
Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML
by legitfile.bat.virus.exe / 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Health
by Alex / 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Kids
by blackchin III / 06/20/2014 at 5:00pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of) / Health
by Anonymous / 06/20/2014 at 3:21pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Health
by forever alone / 06/19/2014 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML
by Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you. / 06/19/2014 at 5:05pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Love
Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML
by fuckmyjob / 06/19/2014 at 4:10pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
Today, I shouldn't have told my boss that I was interested in management. She now throws any problem she doesn't want to solve at me and either gets mad when I can't work it out or takes credit when I do. FML
by Anonymous / 06/19/2014 at 4:24am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was reading butthurt comments about how girl gamers can easily get dates and find love by simply existing. I'm a "girl gamer" who hasn't even found a date, let alone love. I've been looking since I was sixteen. I'm now 27. FML
by cheap / 06/18/2014 at 9:42am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Money
by hoopfrog / 06/18/2014 at 9:26am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by a very unlucky dude. / 06/18/2014 at 2:37am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals
by Carlee_Casten / 06/17/2014 at 4:51pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML
by luckycharmed / 06/17/2014 at 1:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone.… Today, my boyfriend and I were having it off in his den, I screamed at the height of my climax, and… Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone…