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peacheso

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peacheso
  • Town/Country : williamstown NJ, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 582
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About peacheso : It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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peacheso's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

#20871127
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46529) - you deserved it (2743)

On 09/07/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML

#20870154
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45065) - you deserved it (4740)

On 09/06/2013 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by jesus christ, dad (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I had my first date in almost four years. Twenty minutes into our dinner date, I excused myself to use the ladies room. When I came back, not only was he gone, but there was also a security guard waiting to walk me out. I still have no clue why he left or why I got kicked out. FML

#20869864
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (2202)

On 09/06/2013 at 2:42am - love - by thissinglelife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was asked by my neighbor to stop jogging in our neighborhood because he keeps catching his son whacking off while watching me. His son is 28 years old and still lives at home. I'm 18. FML

#20869383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52980) - you deserved it (3659)

On 09/05/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by whatjusthappened - United States (Ohio)

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

#20869348
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45844) - you deserved it (4614)

On 09/05/2013 at 8:29pm - love - by single again - United States (California)

Today, I got home from work and found my dog missing. When I asked my neighbor if she saw what happened, I saw my dog sleeping on her couch. She tried to say it was hers. FML

#20868590
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45994) - you deserved it (2406)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:02am - animals - by GotMyBitchBack - United States (Ohio)

Today, I finally got up the courage to talk to my four-year boyfriend about how insecure I've been feeling in our relationship recently, and how I needed his support while I try to get my self-esteem back on-track. He fell asleep mid-conversation. FML

#20868475
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35872) - you deserved it (4529)

On 09/05/2013 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I realized that I have a rack and butt most girls would be jealous of. That wouldn't be bad if I wasn't a dude. FML

Today, I had to bail my brother out of jail after he punched a convenience store clerk in the face for running out of Cheetos. FML

#20867149
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37478) - you deserved it (3181)

On 09/04/2013 at 3:00am - kids - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22055) - you deserved it (35152)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad told me I was folding my laundry all wrong. I said with a smirk, "A little clothes-minded, are we?" He slapped me. Hard. FML

#20865687
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47869) - you deserved it (10274)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:31am - misc - by fml (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to feed an elderly man in the care home in which I work while he was whacking off. Our work policy states that I have to pretend not to notice. FML

#20865686
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53062) - you deserved it (3222)

On 09/03/2013 at 2:30am - intimacy - by poolgirl789 (woman) - United Kingdom (Bradford)

Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML

#20865525
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39533) - you deserved it (4318)

On 09/03/2013 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was telling my brother about how my new colleagues and I don't share a sense of humour. He replied, "What, you mean they don't pretend to laugh at your jokes like everybody else?" FML

#20864858
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30668) - you deserved it (4806)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:40pm - work - by laughing-stock - United Kingdom (Swindon)



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