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pavingboy

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pavingboy

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  • Number of visits : 196
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pavingboy's page activity

Visits<b>weeyin12</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 5:20pm<b>rocker_chick105</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 1:21pm<b>pris0027</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 8:26pm<b>acke01</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 7:56pm<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 3:30pm<b>rutalking2me</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 10:48pm<b>SandyBella</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:30pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:21am<b>NWO666</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 12:41pm<b>bigboi1992</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 1:50pm<b>Emiler98</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 5:35pm<b>bryant2900</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 2:43pm

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pavingboy's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my co-workers referring to me as "Uncle Fester". This is apparently my nickname around the office, and has been for nearly three years. I had no idea. FML

#21380389
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25190) - you deserved it (2364)

On 03/23/2015 at 9:49pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28427) - you deserved it (3405)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML

#21378402
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31501) - you deserved it (2140)

On 03/20/2015 at 1:50pm - love - by not picking up (man) - Slovenia (Skofljica)

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31387) - you deserved it (2619)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I was supervising a written exam, which took place in a really warm room. Half of the two hundred participants has probably never heard of deodorants. The other half used probably the whole can this morning. I had to stay in this inferno of stench for five hours. FML

#21103838
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37662) - you deserved it (3492)

On 04/03/2014 at 5:48pm - work - by RIP_Nose (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

#21023495
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48397) - you deserved it (4670)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:47am - misc - by wtf - United States (New York)

Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML

#20881965
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44863) - you deserved it (4157)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my halitosis was so bad that when I blew onto my solution in chemistry class, it reacted. FML

#20582010
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30436) - you deserved it (9764) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/09/2013 at 6:29am - health - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that at age 54, I'm no longer young enough to go commando anymore. Every time I sneezed today, I peed myself. FML

#20102528
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18401) - you deserved it (11552)

On 10/05/2012 at 4:14am - health - by Darla (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

#19450302
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9545) - you deserved it (33464)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, I took a pregnancy test. I waited the longest two minutes of my life just to realize I missed the stick. FML

#19412474
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8807) - you deserved it (25557)

On 04/05/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by darkestbarbie - United States (Georgia)

Today, my brother decided deodorant causes cancer. He goes to the gym every day. FML

#18364181
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25618) - you deserved it (2076)

On 11/27/2011 at 5:19am - health - by smellyhouse (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, there were a few loud and annoying kids running around my store. My coworker and I started talking and I jokingly stated "Yeah, kids ruin everything." But before I could get out "God knows I'm not ready to be a dad," my phone rang. It was my one night stand. I'm going to be a daddy. FML

#13180863
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13009) - you deserved it (69339)

On 09/24/2010 at 7:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU", it really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML

#6785905
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24553) - you deserved it (10721)

On 12/16/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML

#6553131
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46442) - you deserved it (7791)

On 12/01/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by xXxJoe16xXx - United States (Massachusetts)



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