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pam241

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pam241
  • Town/Country : united states
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 May 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 463
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pam241's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48374) - you deserved it (29473)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28836) - you deserved it (13483)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a device that plays a high-pitched sound to teach my dog to quit barking. She's smart enough to learn that as long as she barks loud enough and long enough, she can't hear it. Quite the opposite effect to what I was anticipating. FML

#20811031
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40664) - you deserved it (5748)

On 07/30/2013 at 2:42am - animals - by Bug8Frog - United States (Alaska)

Today, I found out my "wonderful" boyfriend was recently dumped by another woman, not just after he started stalking her, but after he wrote her a love letter in his own blood. FML

#20792358
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48634) - you deserved it (3552)

On 07/19/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while walking around town, some guy grabbed me from behind, clutched at my nipples, and said, "That's where I always imagined they were." FML

#20746398
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48620) - you deserved it (3681)

On 06/25/2013 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

#20741108
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38513) - you deserved it (5683)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by our kids will be derps (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

#20740333
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72263) - you deserved it (16406)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

#20723435
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53501) - you deserved it (3993)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Hannah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend asked if I could grow out my pubic hair since I usually wax it. He said his mom has a full bush and he always thought it looks better that way. FML

#20719191
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80758) - you deserved it (6617)

On 06/11/2013 at 8:00am - intimacy - by notyourmom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out where the mysterious bites on my back keep coming from. It's not every day you find an earwig in your loofah. FML

#20687417
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35126) - you deserved it (3722)

On 05/26/2013 at 1:55pm - health - by ewwww (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was roasting marshmallows around a campfire when mine burst into flames. I instinctively shook the stick to get it to go out. The flaming marshmallow then catapulted straight into my eye, burning my whole eyelid. FML

#20672246
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40019) - you deserved it (23035)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:26am - misc - by Devin - United States

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58177) - you deserved it (8824)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I refused to go down on my boyfriend of 9 months. He then shoved me off the couch and, half crying, yelled that I was the third girl this week to turn him down. After sobbing for a bit, he looked me in the eyes and said, "I need you to do this so I can prove my manhood." FML

#20581880
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60999) - you deserved it (7851)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:05am - intimacy - by saywhat (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

#20563680
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61620) - you deserved it (15552)

On 03/28/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by everyoneheard (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I had ordered near my seat. I immediately ran up to him and asked him to stop stealing my food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Seconds later the attendant came out with my actual food. FML

#20562925
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8659) - you deserved it (64082)

On 03/27/2013 at 9:02pm - misc - by Hahamaster333 -



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