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otr13467

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otr13467

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 645
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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otr13467's page activity

Visits<b>Creed96</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 2:14pm

otr13467's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

otr13467's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31647) - you deserved it (3519)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19255) - you deserved it (29692)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of his morning dump because it was heart-shaped. FML

#14608701
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34620) - you deserved it (5930) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

#14187537
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100032) - you deserved it (5447)

On 12/13/2010 at 4:16am - health - by Christopher - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I realized I've been driving for almost two years and still get excited when I park between the lines on my first try. FML

#14017590
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19740) - you deserved it (19535)

On 11/28/2010 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

#13481200
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38283) - you deserved it (8016)

On 10/17/2010 at 1:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML

#13475038
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36450) - you deserved it (3176)

On 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37999) - you deserved it (21759)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, I fainted because of a condition I have. My husband, who was standing right there, failed to catch me because he didn't want to drop his yogurt. FML

#13422951
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32813) - you deserved it (3730)

On 10/12/2010 at 5:52pm - health - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML

#13403987
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29141) - you deserved it (9070)

On 10/11/2010 at 6:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home from a four day trip. Apparently, my cat thought I was gone for good and is now very unhappy that I'm home. I know this because she has been positioning herself between me and my husband all night, and hisses every time I try to touch him. He thinks it's hilarious. FML

#13401139
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29727) - you deserved it (4710)

On 10/11/2010 at 12:34am - love - by JLD - United States (Georgia)

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

#13274886
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24295) - you deserved it (29346)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31947) - you deserved it (28478)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44633) - you deserved it (13203)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48419) - you deserved it (15104)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)



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