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orenjeo

Offline (the 05/04/2015 at 7:45am) | Search for a member

orenjeo

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 December 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 311
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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orenjeo's page activity

Visits<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 9:29pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 1:19pm<b>watermelon15</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 8:14am<b>kayydb7</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:50am<b>Nyx7</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 4:34pm<b>tatertot8604</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 1:51pm<b>beezybaby4714</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 3:41pm<b>JAMESA12345</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 3:28pm<b>LovesSushi</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 3:13am<b>sweatypandalove</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 1:44am<b>Chips18</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 9:46pm

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 3:29am

orenjeo's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of orenjeo's badges

orenjeo's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML

#21281604
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (2788)

On 10/20/2014 at 5:28am - intimacy - by bye loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41431) - you deserved it (4352)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, a midget came in to buy beer. Not only was he almost as tall as me, he got offended when I had to card him and explain that the manager told me to card everyone, and that it wasn't because he was short. FML

#21256044
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33675) - you deserved it (2971)

On 09/10/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by mybad - United States

Today, my friend saw a stamp on my hand and asked me which club I had gone to last night. I was so desperate to seem cool that I lied, instead of admitting it was actually from a children's play group that I took my kids to. FML

#21105342
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (8357)

On 04/05/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by lamemom - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48159) - you deserved it (12261)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was babysitting my nephew and we decided to color together. He drew a picture of someone who looked dead, almost zombie-like, while everyone else looked pretty normal. When I asked who it was, he said in a serious, scary voice, "It's you." FML

#21088838
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36650) - you deserved it (3793)

On 03/17/2014 at 5:51am - kids - by BondingTime - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52260) - you deserved it (6583)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

#20812711
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46156) - you deserved it (4903)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Bnewlove - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

#20744678
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54819) - you deserved it (4480)

On 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss gave me an autographed photo of himself after he heard that I think he's intimidatingly attractive. FML

#20743881
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38650) - you deserved it (8930)

On 06/24/2013 at 1:20am - work - by myfavoritesgouda (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81148) - you deserved it (7401)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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