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omgomgomg_NO

Offline (the 01/05/2015 at 3:44pm) | Search for a member

omgomgomg_NO

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 573
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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omgomgomg_NO's page activity

Visits<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Neon_Minx</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 3:35pm<b>ruahogfan2</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 1:46pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:18am<b>Sassie8810</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:28am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 9:05am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 9:48am<b>slappygecko</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 1:03am<b>procrastinate12</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 10:46pm<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 5:38pm<b>Kibaruto</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 5:18pm<b>Neandertal</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 3:00pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 6:53pm<b>bitset</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 4:52pm<b>TCRII</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 12:35pm<b>sleeplessjimmy</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 11:44am<b>chattysoul890</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:38am<b>Fatboi8989</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 9:43am

omgomgomg_NO's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of omgomgomg_NO's badges

omgomgomg_NO's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62521) - you deserved it (8911)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML

#21181415
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41227) - you deserved it (22253)

On 06/20/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by anon - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50651) - you deserved it (14266)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I clogged my girlfriend's toilet, so being a gentleman, I tried to rectify the situation. I plunged the holy fuck out of that damned toilet, only for her to accuse me of jacking off because I was taking so long. When she stormed in and the smell hit her, she called me a pig. I just can't win. FML

#21159437
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48125) - you deserved it (5078)

On 06/01/2014 at 2:34pm - misc - by shart up, your puns suck (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML

#21157319
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42831) - you deserved it (9928)

On 05/30/2014 at 4:37pm - kids - by get a grip, son (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

#21149341
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42041) - you deserved it (4299)

On 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm - kids - by todaddy (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML

#21143534
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56370) - you deserved it (5654)

On 05/18/2014 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

#21130670
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43101) - you deserved it (6152)

On 05/04/2014 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML

#21112602
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43889) - you deserved it (5551)

On 04/14/2014 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML

#21101616
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57196) - you deserved it (7372)

On 04/01/2014 at 2:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

#21080573
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45762) - you deserved it (24167)

On 03/07/2014 at 2:47pm - intimacy - by onepussytwopussy (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34063) - you deserved it (11865)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, at my job as a librarian at an old library, I was shelving books. Things were great until one entire bookshelf fell over. The damage wasn't too bad. Then the rest fell down. FML

#21072866
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37905) - you deserved it (3617)

On 02/27/2014 at 1:21am - work - by FallCameEarly (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML

#21072281
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36994) - you deserved it (4432)

On 02/26/2014 at 3:55pm - misc - by IVOaf (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

#21068594
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42051) - you deserved it (3944)

On 02/22/2014 at 4:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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