Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

olpally

Offline (the 03/20/2015 at 11:29pm) | Search for a member

olpally

65Fucked!

olpallyolpally
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 24039
  • Number of comments : 3238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : Follow me on Twitter @OlPally86
I will be deleting this within the next week. Im done. Don't ask for snapchat because I deleted it. I can't live with myself.

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>ElMungia</b> - 24 hours ago<b>connectthedots</b> - yesterday at 1:31am<b>KobeLebroJordan</b> - yesterday at 1:57pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - yesterday at 9:53am<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:46pm<b>dandee_one</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:55pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 8:50pm<b>satanarroliga</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 11:53am<b>hfudge</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 8:34pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:12pm<b>zieelona</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:29pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 7:55pm<b>Pikathedoge</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:29pm<b>ktm71125</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:16pm<b>Roskie</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 5:50am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 10:22pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:57am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:37am

Fucked!<b>KobeLebroJordan</b> - yesterday at 7:57pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:56am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:56pm<b>cbreezay</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:07am<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:18pm<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 6:40pm<b>ariesfyre00</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 2:43am<b>cookiethumper</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:28am<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 6:50am<b>Purple_Orgasms</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 12:21pm<b>lilflowjo</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:51am<b>jcshadow</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 2:00am<b>keely617</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:57am<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:35pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:06am<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:31pm<b>kmaheynoway</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 12:16am

olpally's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Devastated, I told my dad about it, hoping he'd help cheer me up. His advice was, "Just rub one out son, you'll feel better in no time." Thanks dad. FML

#21070515
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44113) - you deserved it (6234)

On 02/24/2014 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Author (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

#21070396
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45838) - you deserved it (4324)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by fuckmeitsgettingworse - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

#21070244
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18637) - you deserved it (47599)

On 02/24/2014 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

#21070244
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18637) - you deserved it (47599)

On 02/24/2014 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML

#21070121
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16744) - you deserved it (38371)

On 02/24/2014 at 4:36am - misc - by I hate Walmart???? - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML

#21070121
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16744) - you deserved it (38371)

On 02/24/2014 at 4:36am - misc - by I hate Walmart???? - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my cat decided that instead of using the brand-new scratching post I bought him, he was going to use my pant leg while I was asleep. FML

#21070082
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33409) - you deserved it (3788)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:20am - animals - by tornkhakis - United States (Indiana)

Today, my cat decided that instead of using the brand-new scratching post I bought him, he was going to use my pant leg while I was asleep. FML

#21070082
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33409) - you deserved it (3788)

On 02/24/2014 at 2:20am - animals - by tornkhakis - United States (Indiana)

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

#21069947
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47450) - you deserved it (4248)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by You Are My Sunshine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking a dog at the animal hospital where I work when it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor, who told me to clean it off to see what it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the owner when they pick their dog up. FML

#21069925
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36796) - you deserved it (2915)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:01pm - animals - by crap - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (5603)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (5603)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44110) - you deserved it (5603)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I've been forced to start packing to go on a vacation with my parents, because they say I've been studying too hard and need a break. I've hardly studied at all and was planning on making up for it all in the time I had left before finals. I'm screwed. FML

#21069416
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21212) - you deserved it (37963)

On 02/23/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was helping my wife bring in the groceries. She was able to carry 4 bags and a jug of milk. I was struggling with 2 bags. FML

#21069230
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34418) - you deserved it (20575)

On 02/23/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by weak - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • Elaillce's illustrated FML
  • So, did you catch the game this week? You know, the one with the ball, the scoring and all that stuff. Isn't that how you're supposed to talk to people? OK, I know nothing about sports and teams, but I…

Friday 17 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: