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null
  • Town/Country : -, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 November 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 39733
  • Number of comments : 1039
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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null's favorite FMLs

Today, a police officer gave me a ticket for smoking. He told me that my parents would have to be contacted to come pick me up. My drunk dad came to the rescue, and almost hit the police car. Way to go dad. FML

#14945548
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21523) - you deserved it (15531)

On 02/12/2011 at 3:05am - misc - by savanna(: - United States (Utah)

Today, my Dad thought "Joseph" and "Francis" were two people hacking our internet. They are actually the names of my laptop and iPod, which have now been blocked from using our modem. He can't figure out how to unblock them. FML

#14932841
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13175) - you deserved it (17674)

On 02/11/2011 at 5:59am - misc - by Gem (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML

#14930837
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6987) - you deserved it (65207)

On 02/11/2011 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Zibby -

Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML

#14924487
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6826) - you deserved it (54740)

On 02/10/2011 at 5:37pm - misc - by acab93 - United States (Texas)

Today, I toured an art museum. Our tour guide had an obvious lisp, so I tried my best not to laugh. When she asked me a question about a sculpture, I accidentally responded "Yeth ma'am". She ended the tour right there. FML

#14910524
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7382) - you deserved it (58834)

On 02/09/2011 at 3:56pm - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

#14908981
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14792) - you deserved it (28663)

On 02/09/2011 at 1:02pm - health - by ouch - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally got a reply to the letter to a celebrity that I had to write for my English class. It was a restraining order. FML

#14908129
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25017) - you deserved it (5627)

On 02/09/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by PrestonW -

Today, I was working on my art portfolio. I had drawn a self-portrait. When I was satisfied, I wanted to show my parents. They thought it was a drawing of a bear. FML

#14899477
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21812) - you deserved it (4363)

On 02/08/2011 at 7:30pm - misc - by nomoreart (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was attacked by clowns at work. I don't work at the circus. FML

#14894865
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26642) - you deserved it (3116)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:27am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

#14892103
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7609) - you deserved it (25866)

On 02/08/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Shane -

Today, I was hanging out with my two friends. My hair was hanging over my upper lip, making it look like I had a big mustache. "Hey, look guys!" I said. "I have a mustache!" "I know," they both said without looking. I'm a girl. FML

#14861457
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21956) - you deserved it (6665)

On 02/06/2011 at 1:02am - misc - by xxxchelsiexxx - United States

Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML

#14209243
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33961) - you deserved it (7695)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML

#6286266
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16214) - you deserved it (10687)

On 11/13/2009 at 10:53am - misc - by teepee - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I returned home for the first time in a year, and found my entire computer missing. I asked my grandma about this, and she told me that she threw "the TV" away because it "no longer responded to the remote control." FML

#6270812
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34769) - you deserved it (2462)

On 11/12/2009 at 9:36am - misc - by missmycomp (man) - Singapore



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