This member hasn't filled in their description.
nothing92x's FML badges
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
nothing92x's favorite FMLs
Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML
by awkwardbf / 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by FAIL / 09/08/2009 at 1:29am / United States (Oklahoma) / Kids
by Waheyyy / 09/07/2009 at 3:19pm / United Kingdom / Kids
Today, my mom noticed the hickey that I have on my neck. Embarrassed, I tried convincing her that I burnt myself using a hair straightener. She then told me that that's the same excuse she told my grandma when she got a hickey. FML
by Anonymous / 09/06/2009 at 5:50pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at my boyfriends house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. As a natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML
by JustMyLuck / 09/05/2009 at 9:31pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
Today, I began my job as an intern at a high school. I saw one of the students looked very familiar, and I couldn't remember from where. Then I figured it out, I had hooked up with him at a club last week. He's a junior in high school, I'm in my last year of college. FML
by akward / 09/04/2009 at 1:36pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was following my dad while texting, not really watching where we're going. Suddenly, he ran ahead and I looked up to see what he was doing. We were in the men's bathroom. There were 3 guys at the urinals. I'm a 15 year old girl. FML
by iTerrify / 09/03/2009 at 7:14pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous
Today, someone broke my car's left side mirror. A friend of mine was buying a replacement one and texted me to confirm which one I needed. He asked: "It's the driver's side, right?" To which I replied: "Right". I got the wrong mirror. FML
by Anonymous / 09/01/2009 at 12:25pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML
by sigh / 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy
by arsewipe92 / 08/30/2009 at 12:16am / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML
by notenough / 08/29/2009 at 12:27am / United States (Oregon) / Love
by kitchencrime / 08/28/2009 at 2:11am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend and I went boating. In the middle of the lake, we decided to jump in. We put our valuables in the boat and jumped in. When I tried to get back in the boat, it flipped over, and our cellphones, along with my car keys, are at the bottom of the lake. FML
by p-man / 08/27/2009 at 3:34am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off and learned that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
by damnit / 08/25/2009 at 2:44am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a new cell phone. I was texting pictures from my old phone to my new one, including several dirty ones, when I noticed I wasn't receiving any of them on the new phone. I was texting the wrong number. FML
by Anonymous / 08/24/2009 at 7:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
- Today, my classmate told me that Russia has a larger population than China because Russia is bigger… Today, I finally received my boyfriends birthday gift. 46 days after ordering and paying for 2 days… Today, I had dinner at my boyfriend's parents' house for the first time. I used the bathroom, and…