norge83

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norge83

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4203
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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norge83's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 8:05am<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:53am<b>Bassist_Ibanez</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:41pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 2:11pm<b>awkwardfroggy</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:00am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/21/2013 at 9:10pm<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 12:03am<b>ecoolio</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 10:49am<b>Kuhu1993</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 10:03am<b>phoenixrises</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 4:09am<b>truestorytotell</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 1:23am<b>aliyourpally</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 10:58pm<b>hearters</b> - the 07/30/2012 at 2:57am<b>madamefabulous</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 11:00am<b>poregon</b> - the 04/16/2012 at 6:41pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 2:05pm

norge83's FML badges

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norge83's favorite FMLs

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 8:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

by JamiesMom / 05/13/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML

by peallow / 05/12/2013 at 1:01am / Puerto Rico / Miscellaneous

Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML

by failure as a parent / 05/11/2013 at 5:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

by FenRackety / 05/10/2013 at 8:37am / Canada / Animals

Today, I was reading and started laughing at a funny part in my book. My mom then bitched me out because she thought I was laughing at her. She called me a liar after I explained myself. Her logic? "Books aren't funny". FML

by Marmarfarfar / 05/07/2013 at 12:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finished a dance competition. With competitions, it requires you to wear a lot of makeup like false eyelashes and red lipstick. I went into a Starbucks to get a coffee and a boy around 18 asked me, in all seriousness, what my rate is for one night. FML

by dancer, not a hooker... / 05/05/2013 at 1:01am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

by ADickySituation / 05/05/2013 at 12:14am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

by wtfmama / 05/04/2013 at 8:51am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 5:48pm / United States / Work

Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML

by itsellie27 / 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous