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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1086
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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nofeckingfair's page activity

Visits<b>Darmera</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 5:20am<b>diving</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 10:40am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:54pm<b>GameRater01</b> - the 07/31/2009 at 10:47pm<b>GlobalB</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 11:03am<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 8:51pm<b>DarkMirror</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 8:41pm<b>usernameaz09_</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 9:42am<b>Peroxide</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 9:38am<b>whyowhy26</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 7:46am<b>altna</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 6:47am

nofeckingfair's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

nofeckingfair's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally received a paycheck for the first time in six months. I celebrated by promptly falling down a flight of stairs and losing consciousness. FML

by DBR / 11/23/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

by malebonding / 08/17/2009 at 9:50am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

by ahhahaha / 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was working in a warehouse where fellow employees were kicking empty boxes around. Seeing a box, I got running distance and kicked it as hard as I could, only to look up in horror to see that I had kicked into our CEO's face. I still had both my arms up in score mode. FML

by zwillywilly / 08/10/2009 at 12:03am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

by foretwintie / 06/06/2009 at 7:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, the girl next to me slipped and went flying back against the wall. Indecisive whether to get off and help her or to just keep going, I lost my focus and footing and flew back next to her. FML

by NoPainNoGain / 06/05/2009 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML

by stpdaziandude / 05/08/2009 at 4:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, completely nude, I had to collect my clothes around the boy’s apartment I have been sleeping with for awhile. While his girlfriend watched to make sure I “got the fuck out.” FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was on MSN with my friend and my 9 year old brother. My friend asked me for some advice about how to give a guy a good blowjob. I went into great detail, and then realised that I had typed it to the wrong window. I gave my little brother tips on how to perform fellatio. FML

by imsorrytimmy / 04/02/2009 at 11:34am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Intimacy

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

by JAY22 / 03/26/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boyfriend while he was eating potato chips if he wanted to eat me. He looked at the potato chips, he looked at me and said "Unless your vagina turns into a potato chip, I'd rather eat these." FML

by myennechee / 03/18/2009 at 1:22am / Germany (Hamburg) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

by Boredom / 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML

by blck / 12/31/2008 at 9:53pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous