noah_1234

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noah_1234

13Fucked!

noah_1234noah_1234
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1398
  • Number of comments : 181
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About noah_1234 : From san diego just moved to Minneapolis. Not enjoying the weather 😡. Anyway i like going to the gym and watching football favorite team is Seahawks. Don't really know what else to write so if ur bored u can txt me and my kik is sharif_96.✌️

noah_1234's page activity

Visits<b>fifi125</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 5:55pm<b>0neiros</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 5:34pm<b>lalsr1988</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 2:46pm<b>KJMartinez</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 8:39am<b>panda4545</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 8:22am<b>splitms</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 8:58pm<b>sharonhodo</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 3:50am<b>thatstupidchick</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:34pm<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:13am<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 6:42am<b>mellylicious</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:24am<b>Begiz</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:03am<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 4:25am<b>lifeislifenanana</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 12:46am<b>Paris25</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 11:27pm<b>carlfirebolt</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 12:10pm<b>Marelena20</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 12:36am<b>bella_nana347</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 12:00am

Fucked!<b>Marelena20</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 6:36am<b>orios105</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 9:45am<b>fuckfuckityfuck</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:30am<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 5:12pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 10:35pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 5:28pm<b>Kmichelle1995</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 10:52am<b>emmatheamazingx</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 5:45am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 8:18am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:28pm<b>mischiefkel</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 11:51pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 1:09am<b>thebigtwinkie</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 8:17am

noah_1234's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You've liked someone. How cute!

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noah_1234's favorite FMLs

Today, my "friends" pulled an elaborate prank on me. First, they changed my ringtone to a recording of someone saying "Allahu Akbar" on repeat. Then, they called me as we had a moment of silence in honor of the 9/11 victims. FML

by EverettA / 09/11/2015 at 9:50am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay / 08/21/2015 at 11:25am / Malta / Kids

Today, at work, I was about to close a big sale, when a coworker rushed over and said there was a call for me in the office. He heavily implied my mom had died, and I rushed out. After I figured out there was no call and that my mom was fine, he'd already stolen my sale and the commission. FML

by Anonymous / 05/15/2015 at 4:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, while spring cleaning, my cat came into the kitchen with a live mouse in her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes and dropped the mouse, which then ran into my bedroom. It's been 4 hours and I still can't find it. Where's the cat? Chilling like nothing happened. FML

by craZycatLady / 04/20/2015 at 2:06pm / United States (Kansas) / Animals

Today, I accidentally spilled a big glass of water on the table, where I had some papers, my cellphone, and a box of donuts. With lightning reflexes, my sister heroically jumped forward and saved the donuts. FML

by phones / 01/16/2015 at 12:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

by jigglypluff / 11/19/2014 at 12:27am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

by dicksonthebrain / 09/26/2014 at 9:03am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML

by bri_sci94 / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, marks yet again another day that I've been asked if I'm autistic. No, that's just my Korean accent. Apparently I look "too white" to have one. FML

by notautistic / 09/25/2014 at 9:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was opening the door for my boyfriend, I pressed my boobs against the glass to make him laugh. I didn't see his dad standing just behind him at first, but he certainly saw me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2014 at 11:52am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was told by my doctor I should start eating meat again after two years of vegetarianism, in an effort to be healthier. After horrid gas after my first turkey sandwich, I was told that my body no longer has the enzymes to digest meat. My efforts to be healthy crippled my stomach. FML

by skollasch / 09/25/2014 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I have learned a lot of "big" words from reading so much, but can actually only pronounce about half of them correctly. FML

by anon / 09/25/2014 at 1:48am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working as a teacher at a daycare, a two year-old girl decided the best way to share that she had pooped was to reach in her diaper and attempt to hand some to me. FML

by disgusted / 09/25/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Maine) / Kids

Today, my insane roommate yelled at me for using the word "stupid" because apparently it is a slur against mentally disabled people. Later, she went on and on about this "queer" club she's attending to meet "queer" people to talk about "queer" issues. She's not gay. I am. FML