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ninthsanctum

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ninthsanctum

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1079
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ninthsanctum's page activity

Visits<b>EbolaShiv</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 7:35am<b>Fluffasuars_Rawr</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 5:28am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:22am

ninthsanctum's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ninthsanctum's favorite FMLs

Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML

#20925494
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55166) - you deserved it (5215)

On 10/18/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by O-|---<=~ (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43510) - you deserved it (9713)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML

#20919140
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37983) - you deserved it (12771)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by HSampsON (man) - Niger (Niamey)

Today, my financial troubles got so bad, I contemplated visiting a friend simply so I could swipe their deodorant. FML

#20912330
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39525) - you deserved it (6274)

On 10/08/2013 at 10:34am - money - by moneymoneymoney (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42757) - you deserved it (3705)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in an Austrian bar, making polite conversation in my broken German with a slightly odd middle-aged man. He said, winking, that he was near to his pension. I smiled and nodded, thinking he was talking about retirement. My friend later informed me that 'pension' is German for 'apartment'. Ew. FML

#20903010
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34326) - you deserved it (4152)

On 10/01/2013 at 3:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I got paired up with a coworker for a three-month project. All he talks about is how attractive my girlfriend is and what he would do with her. FML

#20901560
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45955) - you deserved it (3460)

On 09/30/2013 at 2:02am - work - by 3 More Months (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51205) - you deserved it (34428)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught my roommate trying to use my flashlight as a dildo. FML

#20889160
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49234) - you deserved it (4066)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

#20889155
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50233) - you deserved it (3734)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, I walked in on my daughter shaving the testicles of her boyfriend, who had apparently snuck in through her window. FML

#20888905
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53393) - you deserved it (5401)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by disappointed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bumped into a really cute guy I know. I stuttered and floundered, before saying, "Hi, it's me, Megan Thomas." My surname isn't Thomas, but his is. FML

#20888741
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46667) - you deserved it (8303)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:23am - love - by hoolagirl4422 (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I went to visit my overly-posh mother for the first time in many years. Upon arrival, she kicked me out because my outfit did not follow the same color-scheme as her decor. FML

#20888617
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43987) - you deserved it (2999)

On 09/20/2013 at 1:52am - misc - by wat - United States (California)

Today, I found my brother wearing nothing but underwear. That would have been okay if it weren't my lingerie. FML

Today, I went on a blind date. He showed up in a shirt that read, "I f*ck on first dates". FML

#20888198
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50682) - you deserved it (5750)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by ughreally (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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